tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32614766983943550602024-03-07T02:35:38.229-05:00Stooltime CounselingThe 3-legged stool of mental health: The connection between our thoughts, feelings and actions.Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.comBlogger63125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-46737687450478053732021-02-06T15:14:00.004-05:002024-01-01T21:38:11.167-05:00POWER-UP WITH STOOLTIME COUNSELING!<p> </p><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5365033671710299650" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghZM2PHh6w7ctEUH9QiV-gG0LHvTrBXTeCF-e9mqhJyzaonngupFGnjIPpnFppIQJtisJcVKjvK8eYialsXGw6kEggxu-BQ9Ey6rhDVYCY9LexE2gl0QcHmk61vo7rj0iz6CQpKpPUuF0/s400/summer+grad+partiescottage+2009+101.jpg" style="display: block; height: 300px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /><br /><br /><br /><strong style="text-align: center;">Created on July 4th, 2001 </strong><span style="text-align: center;">Copyright © 2001-2024. Stooltime Counseling. All rights reserved.</span><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlb94JebOakMMqvyb847pJM4C3YJY1QdEPq2UDGcFJigtS5NIOmzQNJ67cxh47Pa73GvoGtg1ThICf9sJgp8Jxz8ODq8O5xx5PA2PzHfrjMuB6iw7aeoyNrKpeVCzWa8GoChyN42A614k/s1600/stooltimelogo1.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlb94JebOakMMqvyb847pJM4C3YJY1QdEPq2UDGcFJigtS5NIOmzQNJ67cxh47Pa73GvoGtg1ThICf9sJgp8Jxz8ODq8O5xx5PA2PzHfrjMuB6iw7aeoyNrKpeVCzWa8GoChyN42A614k/s200/stooltimelogo1.jpg" width="191" /></a><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuWZLU2RtWUL-kwnXvWssKff6EjNp_lmaCqHdxWs6-SkyQKHg18f8lCtF-zBF5V4BeeptxgobaFQB5OichNeAuwvDm1-7__HwsgS3J438LGKXDzbofDgnSNYhOA51JjLThlMIQnUSNXtk/s1600/STC+LOGO.png" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuWZLU2RtWUL-kwnXvWssKff6EjNp_lmaCqHdxWs6-SkyQKHg18f8lCtF-zBF5V4BeeptxgobaFQB5OichNeAuwvDm1-7__HwsgS3J438LGKXDzbofDgnSNYhOA51JjLThlMIQnUSNXtk/s200/STC+LOGO.png" width="200" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQuoeTBDhi-UqvP04ntm3Pbdiv0AVZW9E6y9z3tSM65nsXuaTkdCwWvF-9h1zNkv2emwpomxstkwVGWc_fVgmSDLn4GLg4papXDofpiCkF4IqcFkNAKuu2RSdpj1lEO8guMB6Fz56Wb4w/s1600/STC+Anniversary+Tigers.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQuoeTBDhi-UqvP04ntm3Pbdiv0AVZW9E6y9z3tSM65nsXuaTkdCwWvF-9h1zNkv2emwpomxstkwVGWc_fVgmSDLn4GLg4papXDofpiCkF4IqcFkNAKuu2RSdpj1lEO8guMB6Fz56Wb4w/s400/STC+Anniversary+Tigers.jpg" width="400" /></a></div> <em><strong><span style="color: red;"></span></strong></em><br /><em><strong><span style="color: red;">Some basic principles to get started:</span></strong></em><br /><strong>* Know yourself, trust yourself, choose yourself.<br />* Learn from the past as opposed to live in the past.<br />* Live in the moment, the here-and-now.<br />* Plan for the future rather than worry about the future.<br />* Voice + Choice = Self-Esteem!<br />* Thoughts + Feelings + Actions = Change.</strong><br /><br /><em><span style="color: red;"><strong>Understanding the meaning of the STC 3-legged stool:</strong></span></em><br />In counseling theory, the three-legged stool is a metaphor for the balance of life. Each of the three legs means something different. Together they represent a tripod of human thoughts, feelings and actions. The stool depends on all three legs to keep it sturdy. The legs are as interdependent as human thoughts, feelings and actions. For human beings to live balanced and sturdy lives, we need all three legs. Anything less would be a loose stool! Stooltime Counseling connects human thoughts, feelings and actions to offer one explanation of how we experience the world, each other and ourselves. (For introspective people, who have a spiritual awareness, read between the legs because it's there, too). The STC 3-legged stool metaphor is the trifecta of mental health.<br /><br /><strong>DESCRIPTION OF STOOLTIME COUNSELING:</strong><br />What's on your mind? What do you feel? What are you doing? What's the connection between our thoughts, feelings and actions? Like water, steam and ice, three realities that come from one source, in this instance, H20, so it is with our thoughts, feelings and actions. Three realities that come from one source, in this instance, our human condition.<br /><br />How can we view our problems from a different perspective to find a solution? How can we begin to improve the quality of our life? What is human potential in relation to our strengths and growth areas? Do you need help sorting through questions like these? You're in a place that may help! The forum I use to communicate with you is the written word. There is no face-to-face contact with this professional. If you are in crisis, there are other forums of counseling from which to choose.<br /><br /><strong>My areas of specialty include:</strong><br /><em>Mental Health<br />Self-Esteem<br />Stress Management<br />Pre-Marital Counseling<br />Sports Counseling</em><br /><br />As you read other postings from the Library Of Articles (see below), you will see self-help articles I have written. Read about our human condition from the perspective of a counselor. Lets get growing, I mean going!<br /><br /><strong>EDUCATION/EXPERIENCE:</strong><br />1977: Associates degree. General Studies. Macomb Community College.<br /><br />1981: Bachelor of Science. Human Resources Development. Oakland University.<br /><br />1988: Master of Arts. Counseling. Oakland University.<br /><br />1987: Apprentice Substance Abuse Counseling Certification.<br /><br />1988: Registered Social Worker, State of MI. Licensed in 2006.<br /><br />1990: Licensed Professional Counselor, State of MI.<br /><br />2000: Certified Sports Counselor, Diplomate.<br /><br />1980-1982: Recreational Therapist. Glen Eden Hospital.<br /><br />1982-1989: Mental Health Worker. Psychiatric Center Of Michigan Hospital.<br /><br />1984-1985: Nautilus/Aerobics/Stress Management Instructor. Salt River Racquetball Club.<br /><br />1985-1987: Adult Education Teacher/Counselor. L'Anse Creuse Public Schools, Opportunity To Change program.<br /><br />1989-2020: Mental Health Clinician. Oakland County Community Mental Health; Easter Seals.<br /><br />2001-2009: Mental Health Therapist. St. Joseph's Mercy Hospital/Henry Ford Macomb Hospital.<br /><br />2003-2010: Pre-Marital Counselor. Holy Cross, St. Catherine, St. Mark churches.<br /><br />August, 2005: Member of the Human Development Steering Committee with the Statue Of Responsibility Foundation; later invited to join the Public Relations Committee. <a href="http://statueofresponsibility.com/">The Statue Of Responsibility Foundation.</a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbxfaDJitVx-zTtuFokcpcYKmeS9Z-B5hzfKqxzcZDxDmuu0Yq9fbcfeFCo0akI86Cc6e1O_cfpurL1xLSmPzzMaRPQAsWTXt3cVaKNrCG-n1GAy5Nj1-JdjX8-Ipz6Pqvm2qjb8Sxmto/s1600/Statue+of+Responsibility+%2526+Statue+of+Liberty..jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5780106269102174722" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbxfaDJitVx-zTtuFokcpcYKmeS9Z-B5hzfKqxzcZDxDmuu0Yq9fbcfeFCo0akI86Cc6e1O_cfpurL1xLSmPzzMaRPQAsWTXt3cVaKNrCG-n1GAy5Nj1-JdjX8-Ipz6Pqvm2qjb8Sxmto/s320/Statue+of+Responsibility+%2526+Statue+of+Liberty..jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 92px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a><br /><br /><strong>FEE SCHEDULE:</strong><br />The information and professional opinion expressed in Stooltime Counseling are free to read. I earn money if you choose to purchase available Stooltime Counseling merchandise. Questions/comments about Stooltime Counseling can be posted on any article written by me on this website.<br /><br /><strong>Great Things Are Coming:</strong><br />1) Show your support for Stooltime Counseling and be acknowledged on this website. Invest in the purchase of any available Stooltime Counseling merchandise, get a picture of you or your pet wearing it and e-mail it to me: <a href="mailto:stooltime@gmail.com">stooltime@gmail.com</a> . With your permission, I'll post it. Current pictures can be viewed on the various articles contained in the Library Of Articles. Here is one example:<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMgu62zIWVao6v4mmy00ED2dJ851L_ZaSozMQL6itLDoXf7ZVeSTyg69RgNJzTFTKewAp4591_KRyH2nsJDOYB3DHuqAl5LEjP4edmDfkvDxxNe0nMxP_VYnTQalZtb3vxXx-MuCU6klE/s1600/Gunner.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMgu62zIWVao6v4mmy00ED2dJ851L_ZaSozMQL6itLDoXf7ZVeSTyg69RgNJzTFTKewAp4591_KRyH2nsJDOYB3DHuqAl5LEjP4edmDfkvDxxNe0nMxP_VYnTQalZtb3vxXx-MuCU6klE/s400/Gunner.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><b>Even a camel named Gunner finds the time to show his support for Stooltime Counseling. Thanks, buddy!</b><br /><br />2) Watch and listen for Stooltime Counseling videos coming this way. Visual and audio learning at its finest! Stooltime Counseling has its own YouTube channel.<br /><br />3) Readers have the opportunity to e-mail me videos of their thoughts and feelings about any article contained in Stooltime Counseling's Library Of Articles. Keep it classy, appropriate and under 2 minutes, and with your permission, I will post it.<br /><br /><strong><em><span style="color: red;">Disclaimer:</span></em></strong><br /><strong>The use of Stooltime Counseling is not intended to treat any mental, emotional or behavioral condition. It is for educational purposes, and a venue for readers and me to bloviate opinions, some of which are based on counseling theories, and others based on personal experience.<br /><br />Stooltime Counseling may include hyperlinks to third-party content. Stooltime Counseling is not responsible for third-party content available from such resources or websites because it goes against one of my basic tenants: Personal responsibility for thoughts, feelings and actions.<br /><br />Please use this website and third-party content at your own discretion.</strong><br /><br /><span style="color: red;"><em><span style="color: red;"><strong>Stooltime Counseling is dedicated to the celebration of my dad's life. I remember Gene Rogers as an awesome man! We miss your presence, dad, remember your love, and know that our loss is Heaven's gain!</strong></span></em></span><br /><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody><tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDT1eXJ8BrNrcfdpxqUm4ixAoinQ6uYvFT3n9saor8hcvdsLyToXW2rpH7eBmm5BlbhE-H2i9BKp4V7xyuMI13v8LCPfJ9162Rgul56hamDWUg7-HCO0kZjSMPDCwopZbLseOl7nNey_w/s1600/aaa.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="220" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDT1eXJ8BrNrcfdpxqUm4ixAoinQ6uYvFT3n9saor8hcvdsLyToXW2rpH7eBmm5BlbhE-H2i9BKp4V7xyuMI13v8LCPfJ9162Rgul56hamDWUg7-HCO0kZjSMPDCwopZbLseOl7nNey_w/s400/aaa.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption"><strong>Taking A Swing At Mental Health Since July 4th, 2001</strong></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody><tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0mSeRvnhyphenhyphen1hQHuXwjRAIgPJQi_dzr1cMpSDNWjyVZ-iu3yMJtrq3cVNLQvg6gpBbqbCaczdMARn6wgVut347k1Pp7Q0BvlN57QylyC5jtxMkMUCOZkqWBgezqL4Lpq2qT7By_7SeXBOA/s1600/mental+health+warrior.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="528" data-original-width="959" height="220" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0mSeRvnhyphenhyphen1hQHuXwjRAIgPJQi_dzr1cMpSDNWjyVZ-iu3yMJtrq3cVNLQvg6gpBbqbCaczdMARn6wgVut347k1Pp7Q0BvlN57QylyC5jtxMkMUCOZkqWBgezqL4Lpq2qT7By_7SeXBOA/s400/mental+health+warrior.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption"><strong>Mark Rogers, LPC: Mental Health Warrior working to defeat the stigma of mental illness</strong>.</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-rYvd2VBu93SeN7gK1W-ivrJZDb_ovAsfK3_ehwaddLUL1uoK6nqglo2HZwyDcwT6tvgz3cT7X9gYwx-ED92ntGUC2X3q01I1dhWVZEmoyV7MpRiPSHX2JOwnnvTlRUa6sgQYWNPP72o/s1600/stooltime2020web.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="537" data-original-width="960" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-rYvd2VBu93SeN7gK1W-ivrJZDb_ovAsfK3_ehwaddLUL1uoK6nqglo2HZwyDcwT6tvgz3cT7X9gYwx-ED92ntGUC2X3q01I1dhWVZEmoyV7MpRiPSHX2JOwnnvTlRUa6sgQYWNPP72o/s320/stooltime2020web.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip2jl3OwnwLM7_TRr7slsPSyfPqtuFHiqM7Eo74tESxoUHfkmCj1vZxp-SsipQiw0XX4A_xiv2V1wBoeuv85YSA6RQExmvLfBURSPjAPF_gLb4IDgwT0jN_XOo4_GpchpcqlwtOUtWbDg/s1600/you+tube.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="177" data-original-width="285" height="124" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip2jl3OwnwLM7_TRr7slsPSyfPqtuFHiqM7Eo74tESxoUHfkmCj1vZxp-SsipQiw0XX4A_xiv2V1wBoeuv85YSA6RQExmvLfBURSPjAPF_gLb4IDgwT0jN_XOo4_GpchpcqlwtOUtWbDg/s200/you+tube.png" width="200" /></a><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs1Aet2Umfy9kgPi-bM6GVQ9h8ibTA2u7qw7Ih3VkHwqE6I2FEU4Etn16CoHfBiy-TEpzyUMsRcaPSF224KsjGjek2lC1Rvgr49SBx1M4oid0KLKTgyrPjhdd5DDwoBeaGnhOHpbRQBHE/s1600/you+tube.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/user/StooltimeCounseling">Click here to watch Stooltime Counseling's YouTube channel.</a><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi171PhrlsZSBIV_gUPrFfQDxXOzWap_Pl7oQ01rHWXYc2uXpGSHhk4bcrWBPHgT3V01_DLfAkI19a8Rm7Gm0Xwmcz8lG1KLCLXbDVWStXDSCJUSBDIDJt_7hA6N8WTYyF1EG9m0LeVufA/s1070/msrlpcstc.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1070" data-original-width="1069" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi171PhrlsZSBIV_gUPrFfQDxXOzWap_Pl7oQ01rHWXYc2uXpGSHhk4bcrWBPHgT3V01_DLfAkI19a8Rm7Gm0Xwmcz8lG1KLCLXbDVWStXDSCJUSBDIDJt_7hA6N8WTYyF1EG9m0LeVufA/s320/msrlpcstc.jpg" /></a></div>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-47215908933624438532021-02-06T15:01:00.015-05:002021-05-30T16:13:17.334-05:00MOTHER'S LITTLE HELPER<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/x-zxBNz3XbM" width="320" youtube-src-id="x-zxBNz3XbM"></iframe></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">"Mother's Little Helper," by the band, Rolling Stones. A song about the anti-anxiety agent called, Valium. My, how much we have learned since 1966, when this song was introduced.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">For example, doctors are learning how the long-term use of anti-anxiety agents (greater than 6 months) can increase a person's risk of developing early onset dementia.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">An informed consumer always weighs the risks vs. benefits of taking any prescribed medication. Talk with your doctor. Then, talk with a Licensed Professional Counselor to learn some behavioral techniques to help manage symptoms of anxiety.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b>Meet Julia, who is a Licensed Social Worker. She chose to work in the helping profession to be of service to others as they take their journey from out-of-the-dark into the light. Today, Julia, the light is on you for choosing to be a Stooltime Counseling model. Thank you!</b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMqIc2wy7ReUihotg-Hm9LNXTNYG7nAvSk4Xe6rcrLjVZ-x8SY4S0gf_JL8GnNtvTOe9a9Nxe1mzW8_wb5mW6uAjsfODfetTnvbRLJRvk1Sa_U1y-7UNucHRSae-qMbJt-Zc8XAri9Sdg/s1440/juliadunn.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMqIc2wy7ReUihotg-Hm9LNXTNYG7nAvSk4Xe6rcrLjVZ-x8SY4S0gf_JL8GnNtvTOe9a9Nxe1mzW8_wb5mW6uAjsfODfetTnvbRLJRvk1Sa_U1y-7UNucHRSae-qMbJt-Zc8XAri9Sdg/s320/juliadunn.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTDRIu75BsYVRhCK-jTjFLe7vhSTfVDO6VLWIqqcXZB_T64gTkxjRzUfYAJKceheyhVhQV4NrJIFG94o0RhozVDbM4vGQPiug968n77wbafinDgyNg0N3ps_b01TtNVZGUQ8iCy-G67gg/s1080/FB_IMG_1622130859592.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="810" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTDRIu75BsYVRhCK-jTjFLe7vhSTfVDO6VLWIqqcXZB_T64gTkxjRzUfYAJKceheyhVhQV4NrJIFG94o0RhozVDbM4vGQPiug968n77wbafinDgyNg0N3ps_b01TtNVZGUQ8iCy-G67gg/s320/FB_IMG_1622130859592.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></div><br /><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><p></p>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-51357574580498018492021-02-06T14:54:00.003-05:002021-05-30T16:14:50.875-05:00BE LIKE WATER<p><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKzcb8EMlQ09pMkT3eU4k9DeXpAyth-jQgWm1Jub7O-vco2cUEzxtghCyIMyony5wDGGe_Hoi3vEAV52NN5LoPz0HvdjARU1fQ1DzJ2Qq-kfATNt1jbWIG3j61ocUBwsJBBottXmuSh1M/s470/water.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="245" data-original-width="470" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKzcb8EMlQ09pMkT3eU4k9DeXpAyth-jQgWm1Jub7O-vco2cUEzxtghCyIMyony5wDGGe_Hoi3vEAV52NN5LoPz0HvdjARU1fQ1DzJ2Qq-kfATNt1jbWIG3j61ocUBwsJBBottXmuSh1M/s320/water.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /> </span><p></p><p><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">I don't remember where I was in Royal Oak, MI. on August 11th, 2014, when I took this picture driving home from work, but I do remember it took 9-hours to get home that night as opposed to the usual 1-hour and 15 minutes. When martial arts expert, Bruce Lee, one time said, "Be like water," I don't think he meant this. </span></p><p><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Be strong and resilient! Tough times don't last, but tough people do, and so will a car with a rudder in this mess. In life, lacking a rudder means not having a clear sense of one's aims or principles. Find your rudder in life and move forward no matter how long it takes.</span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9gkmcC5N-Rn_VjQ1orNz3flWeUIW32rozwwrbbeGKR4uTHkJxdHDjqJcKrdtGM4L9o9paekvC0bjTD_q7zBNArXsy5GvU5Jcwwtp_q5LdCWYi58afKMfUy3SUxXwr79mqlqcy8Wdf3YA/s1440/FB_IMG_1622130822161.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9gkmcC5N-Rn_VjQ1orNz3flWeUIW32rozwwrbbeGKR4uTHkJxdHDjqJcKrdtGM4L9o9paekvC0bjTD_q7zBNArXsy5GvU5Jcwwtp_q5LdCWYi58afKMfUy3SUxXwr79mqlqcy8Wdf3YA/s320/FB_IMG_1622130822161.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiX1NOpF7tNmaDi9uQdnc9Wul_rf_ylbZvenuGOVuW-PRF9PQCZPIH2-Zi8ElhSPISlp2qhd19LSy5d4UR5KzOqer1IL0NsaSYcBL8kIi_Vx6grByNSu3ZbzlhxKwYNyLtRvKGJm2gjMDY/s1080/FB_IMG_1622130808006.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiX1NOpF7tNmaDi9uQdnc9Wul_rf_ylbZvenuGOVuW-PRF9PQCZPIH2-Zi8ElhSPISlp2qhd19LSy5d4UR5KzOqer1IL0NsaSYcBL8kIi_Vx6grByNSu3ZbzlhxKwYNyLtRvKGJm2gjMDY/s320/FB_IMG_1622130808006.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirzPqKxYj_Qehqy7bi_FptdOpur3XOxAv4yXrkt39uw4kNJy6tJnLqAbV7YP6f8aU036riBnaFEKk9l4ltcKLlKPn6GCdeqfjlpjiWh09cVuxqu2R1-ZjoX_OGwv-yQ1LGYI6Rk0FCD80/s1080/FB_IMG_1622130795133.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirzPqKxYj_Qehqy7bi_FptdOpur3XOxAv4yXrkt39uw4kNJy6tJnLqAbV7YP6f8aU036riBnaFEKk9l4ltcKLlKPn6GCdeqfjlpjiWh09cVuxqu2R1-ZjoX_OGwv-yQ1LGYI6Rk0FCD80/s320/FB_IMG_1622130795133.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-18483983545444045012021-02-06T14:47:00.011-05:002021-07-13T12:26:20.630-05:00A SENSE OF BELONGING<p> <span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">A sense of "belonging" is a human need just like the need for food, shelter and a sense of security. A feeling of "belonging" is important in seeing value in life and in coping with intensely painful emotions. </span></p><p><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Depending on who you are, you might find value in "belonging" to any one or more of tens of thousands of different groups. It could be a gym, religious group, school, work-setting, 12-step program, family, circle of friends, sorority, fraternity, military, union, social media, gang, political affiliation, or even a membership to the Charles Atlas Champions club. A sense of "belonging" helps a person develop a sense of self and personal identity. </span></p><p><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">What groups do you choose to belong? Whichever ones they are, it says a lot about your values, and can even help answer the question, "Who am I?"</span></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKS32YQuzuZAsssqWjDmZeM3Oon_1OPKMWFdqnZ0b94vVGEzh4Vyo6dfeGxemGFvMKWPnTYU3HHH-xG3q1onCpnXJ68e3SXmwGvYkLKMz50hTxxMF07P-6v6aND26p5bdBkAMQoRUtOh8/s525/Charles+Atlas.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="300" data-original-width="525" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKS32YQuzuZAsssqWjDmZeM3Oon_1OPKMWFdqnZ0b94vVGEzh4Vyo6dfeGxemGFvMKWPnTYU3HHH-xG3q1onCpnXJ68e3SXmwGvYkLKMz50hTxxMF07P-6v6aND26p5bdBkAMQoRUtOh8/s320/Charles+Atlas.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div><br /></div><br /><span face=""Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxAzXyFLED81e91-qJl2wbnYXXdBYw8O8kynwlGEFaQ0nIumw31zKdv7yiSkkCzDXwDASXDACtJcnlev-2DbLJiQZ4EOvyrAwBwHQhUw9ifmUNVbybq6D_7faxuJkKQSDkNrMxcWUfbeQ/s1080/FB_IMG_1622130771094.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxAzXyFLED81e91-qJl2wbnYXXdBYw8O8kynwlGEFaQ0nIumw31zKdv7yiSkkCzDXwDASXDACtJcnlev-2DbLJiQZ4EOvyrAwBwHQhUw9ifmUNVbybq6D_7faxuJkKQSDkNrMxcWUfbeQ/s320/FB_IMG_1622130771094.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div><b>Thank you, Art and Stacey! A great couple, who support Stooltime Counseling.</b></div><div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7LFCnNYE_7Dba0d3bzbQUaLVcKS0DKcLy2cT8tewk49GfMheAWlfxbMXMaBRHzv3mdjXubDrQOdedP8ftSrcHJonlY7iAC_x_lOu9uLgATVEKlzTctbl_xdK0HAbm5TNkqL16QMjo0wo/s1440/FB_IMG_1622130739768.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7LFCnNYE_7Dba0d3bzbQUaLVcKS0DKcLy2cT8tewk49GfMheAWlfxbMXMaBRHzv3mdjXubDrQOdedP8ftSrcHJonlY7iAC_x_lOu9uLgATVEKlzTctbl_xdK0HAbm5TNkqL16QMjo0wo/s320/FB_IMG_1622130739768.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQXtFE59yVnAsqbnh6M9BZVCgQGJD_7kJpy3vvKQckvyUxp6JmVYkq5OQI6h6ZyLHR5CD6DXGeUcfN4Lq_cEWF2L3FbZzsKf_etE36oPMNFHfo4jmWEcy-FJ_0g3_AdovMDCUys3AAxI0/s960/FB_IMG_1622130726889.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="528" data-original-width="960" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQXtFE59yVnAsqbnh6M9BZVCgQGJD_7kJpy3vvKQckvyUxp6JmVYkq5OQI6h6ZyLHR5CD6DXGeUcfN4Lq_cEWF2L3FbZzsKf_etE36oPMNFHfo4jmWEcy-FJ_0g3_AdovMDCUys3AAxI0/s320/FB_IMG_1622130726889.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div><b>You're the man, Will. I appreciate your support for Stooltime Counseling. Thank you!</b></div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuuSU-KXuyAkrIYbv5NVL1NYtkUJKfhq7mwcjHQCf9kpkNyL56koQU0jFJ08BsVXp5b7xqdlbmbXMDeSrThriAKyvYYh19P7t8_S8bQx2GdKbu4Jy7v8ExPGIUZjAL6K3NAgKWmsBZyc4/s2643/20210710_182121.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2643" data-original-width="1189" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuuSU-KXuyAkrIYbv5NVL1NYtkUJKfhq7mwcjHQCf9kpkNyL56koQU0jFJ08BsVXp5b7xqdlbmbXMDeSrThriAKyvYYh19P7t8_S8bQx2GdKbu4Jy7v8ExPGIUZjAL6K3NAgKWmsBZyc4/s320/20210710_182121.jpg" /></a></div><div><b>Two amazing young women, who are sisters, supporting Stooltime Counseling! Thank you, Samantha and Sophia. I appreciate your support.</b></div></div>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-84150452340141053272021-02-06T14:40:00.004-05:002021-05-30T16:17:37.421-05:00BUILDING A HOUSE vs. BUILDING A LIFE<p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Zachary worked for a contractor, who built houses. One day, the boss informed Zachary he was going on an extended leave, but wanted Zachary to do a job while he was gone. </span></p><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Zachary's job was to build a house. He was granted access to all the materials he needed to build the house. After some thought, Zachary decided if he cut some corners by using 2nd-rate materials, he could save some money, and pocket the profit.</div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">The house was built, and when the boss came back from his extended leave, praised Zachary for a job well done. Based on the optics of the house, it looked like a nicely built house, but Zachary knew cheap materials were used to build it, and so it would not withstand the test-of-time.</div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">To the surprise of Zachary, the boss wanted to reward him for being such a responsible, dependable and loyal employee, and so the boss told Zachary he could keep the house for himself.</div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">In comparing the building of a house to the building of a life, we would need to change the materials being used. Lumber, concrete and bricks are some of the materials used to build a house. Values, decisions and relationships are some of the materials used to build a life.</div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Cutting corners in either case, a house or a life, will eventually catch-up to the builder. Being honest with oneself, and not living life half-heartedly, are traits that tend to withstand the test-of-time, whether it be with a house or a life.</div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Now go out there and build something!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXbHDF1fEwJ-suTcSVf4WNm8KELeFlrmpWyv0m-jBByoLbM-cNB3ku4lK0ebInekun1QRZOAHIapso0pz9ptmhXn3mZWGLyhXAECrEB-ZBsGvCtszbZzeMfRjtWpcJJhW6dD2DIFlME3I/s400/bricks.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="309" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXbHDF1fEwJ-suTcSVf4WNm8KELeFlrmpWyv0m-jBByoLbM-cNB3ku4lK0ebInekun1QRZOAHIapso0pz9ptmhXn3mZWGLyhXAECrEB-ZBsGvCtszbZzeMfRjtWpcJJhW6dD2DIFlME3I/s320/bricks.png" width="320" /></a></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></div><br /><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0No-4x6A4_jCFuZ0Bo83etJJZna6s0tiORR-86d1pszoIk2b59Fdyh_dBts8XmPygAufYobnqUeJGhPmrpUpHzOgSrgFPIT-LizHL8o6yOQMZyS53v0u9XDgKwZCdIGMN97yAu-wWDME/s1440/FB_IMG_1622130653832.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0No-4x6A4_jCFuZ0Bo83etJJZna6s0tiORR-86d1pszoIk2b59Fdyh_dBts8XmPygAufYobnqUeJGhPmrpUpHzOgSrgFPIT-LizHL8o6yOQMZyS53v0u9XDgKwZCdIGMN97yAu-wWDME/s320/FB_IMG_1622130653832.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitoHPc3rFxTU0udlBpvW7CVLJplqIxx3-0kTltQB3SY4BxPAg7wtEsJOiXhkfSQ91f2bhoGVhVjKEg99b3oo7ZAbos07pOQqv-Rj7EFVjFFPO0wlXnQPHG-iaUCTwtUb8DDrODjqCBEzI/s1440/FB_IMG_1622130686423.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitoHPc3rFxTU0udlBpvW7CVLJplqIxx3-0kTltQB3SY4BxPAg7wtEsJOiXhkfSQ91f2bhoGVhVjKEg99b3oo7ZAbos07pOQqv-Rj7EFVjFFPO0wlXnQPHG-iaUCTwtUb8DDrODjqCBEzI/s320/FB_IMG_1622130686423.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih5Ax8DUxsfZX0LnW__hA5amfp91ca4Bj8QNmasXF7rhVn6fpt6OfJZTRoVfDOuJqV-YovZL6v6S6MeWiGn_rMD2SbZJGbkc-eCNT98R6ycFHK-YKD6dflBkqWFDS3Gh2e4i9FszYkuh0/s960/FB_IMG_1622130705394.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="528" data-original-width="960" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEih5Ax8DUxsfZX0LnW__hA5amfp91ca4Bj8QNmasXF7rhVn6fpt6OfJZTRoVfDOuJqV-YovZL6v6S6MeWiGn_rMD2SbZJGbkc-eCNT98R6ycFHK-YKD6dflBkqWFDS3Gh2e4i9FszYkuh0/s320/FB_IMG_1622130705394.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-44702882129630995932012-12-14T08:10:00.002-05:002015-11-24T00:30:17.938-05:00CROCKPOT vs. MICROWAVEOne of Aesop's Fables is the story about the Tortoise and the Hare. In the story, the fast moving hare mocks the slow-moving tortoise and challenges him to a foot race. Despite the disparity of physical agility, one moves slower than the other, everytime I read the story, the slow-moving tortoise wins the race. Does the fast-moving hare lose the race because he is over-confident as evidenced by wasting his time by taking a nap during the race, or does the tortoise teach us that industriousness, zeal and perseverance prevail over laziness? Maybe there's another lesson to be learned from this fable: Sometimes being slow, deliberate and persistent wins the race. There is a difference between a crockpot and a microwave.<br />
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A crockpot (metaphor for the tortoise) slowly cooks food that delivers a taste much different from food cooked in a microwave (metaphor for the hare). Both have their place and purpose in the kitchen. It takes time to cook food in the crockpot, whereas, if you're in a hurry, the microwave is more practical. Lets apply the crockpot/microwave metaphor to real-life situations and related expectations.<br />
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<strong>Career Path:</strong><br />
How many college students expect to earn "big bucks" at their first job after graduating? Maybe it could happen, but a more realistic expectation includes the following mentality: "I will invest myself in a job after graduating from college, and view it as a stepping-stone to something bigger and better. In the meantime, I will prove to employers how dependable and valuable I am within the confines of the free market." This mentality is an example of a person believing making "big bucks" is something that is earned over time, not automatically granted. There is no sense of entitlement. Building personal credibility in the marketplace takes time. It is the difference between the tortoise and the hare, the crockpot and the microwave.<br />
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<strong>Getting Rich:</strong><br />
For people who value having lots and lots of money, getting from point A (being poor) to point B (being rich) can either be exciting or disappointing. The slow way to get rich is to earn money at a chosen profession, career or calling, wisely invest it and then watch as the compounding interest does its thing. The fast way to get rich is to win the lottery. The odds to make it rich are in favor of the slow, methodical way. Yes, it takes longer to work, earn money and invest it to have lots of money than it takes to win the lottery. However, I wonder how many rich people buy lottery tickets? Maybe the lottery is geared towards a poor person's hope/dream/desire to get rich. Whatever the case, I will rely more on cooking my food in the crockpot with this example in my efforts to prepare for my financial future. For right now, I'm enjoying the journey more than the destination!<br />
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<strong>Multi-Tasking:</strong><br />
Multi-tasking is the ability to do more than one thing at a time. There are risks and benefits to multi-tasking. One of the benefits is the "happy" feeling that is experienced by multi-taskers because so much more can be achieved by doing more than one thing at a time. A drawback is the diminished ability to focus and concentrate on any one task at a time. Ask any person who has had a car accident while texting and driving at the same time, which is not recommended and could be against the law. The jury is still out, but long-term multi-taskers could be putting themselves at risk for losing IQ points, too. Crockpot or Microwave? Doing one thing at a time or doing more than one thing at a time? Moving slow or moving fast? You decide. <a href="http://www.multitaskingtest.net.au/the-science" target="_blank">The science behind multi-tasking</a>.<br />
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<strong>My Dad's Advice To Me:</strong><br />
My dad would say to me, 'When you do a job, take your time and do it well. You're less likely to make a mistake when you don't rush.' It takes less time to do a job right than it takes to explain why you did it wrong. My dad was a Professional Engineer. My dad did not like to waste time, nor did he have the inclination to feel rushed when he was working. Slow and steady gets the job done correctly the first time so you don't have to go back and do it over. Measure twice, cut once!<br />
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<strong>Delayed vs. Instant Gratification:</strong><br />
The only legal and moral get-rich-quick plan of which I am aware is to count your blessings. However, from the advertising arena, many of us are led to believe it is possible to get-rich-quick almost quicker than it takes to snap your fingers. What about the ads that proclaim a person can lose up to twenty pounds in one week? Instant gratification is promised in a lot of ads, but rarely delivered. Then there's the media. Growing up in the age of television and movies, we are shown how the presenting problem in the plot is resolved anywhere between 30 minutes and 2 hours. <br />
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Many people think real life moves as fast as the ads promise, or as fast as conflict is resolved on TV shows and movies. Many of us want to believe in false promises and consequently feel a sense of false hope. Getting the results we want, the faster the better, is glamorized as something that is realistically achieveable. Life is generally more complex than what the culture portrays in some advertising claims and in some media outlets. Real life is different from what we see on TV and the big screen. If advertising and media versions of life sound too good to be true, they probably are too good to be true.<br />
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<strong>Driving:</strong><br />
Time = Distance/Speed.<br />
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Most trips in the car are 25 miles or less. Lets say a person decides to drive 65 mph rather than 55 mph for 25 miles. The faster car will arrive at its destination 4 minutes and 20 seconds quicker than the slower car. <br />
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How about a road trip between New York City and Los Angeles? Total driving miles = approximately 2,787 miles. The hare drives 80 mph and arrives at his destination in 34 hours and 48 minutes. It will take the tortoise 39 hours and 48 minutes driving the same distance at 70 mph. The hare shows-up about 5 hours sooner, but at what expense?<br />
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The above two driving examples assume a constant speed so actual variables like stopping and slowing aren't taken into account. They also assume that the hare is driving over the speed limit, while the tortoise is driving the speed limit. Even driving the speed limit is considered to be too slow for the hare.<br />
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<strong><em>Driving the posted speed limit, when conditions allow for it, is not a suggestion. It is the law.</em></strong><br />
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Driving even a few miles over the speed limit increases a driver's chances of losing control of the vehicle, increases braking distance, reduces effectiveness of seat belt and other safety devices, increases chances of getting a ticket and subsequent higher insurance premiums and dramatically increases the severity of injuries if there is a crash.<br />
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Comedian, Rodney Dangerfield, once joked, 'When I heard most car accidents happen within 25 miles from home, I decided to move.'<br />
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<strong>In Summary:</strong><br />
Whether you decide to live your life in the fast lane, the slow lane or somewhere in the middle, it is easy to become so distracted by what you believe needs to be done that you don't remember to be grateful for the ability to do. To breathe. To laugh. To love. To see. To hear. To taste. To smell. To touch. To speak. To listen. To think. To feel. To act. To live in the moment. These are invaluable gifts!<br />
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Written by,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor.<br />
(12/12).<br />
<br />
<i>I acknowledge financial expert, Dave Ramsey, for talking about the "crockpot & microwave" metaphor on one of his radio shows. It inspired me to write this article. Thanks, Dave!</i><br />
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<b>Taking a time-out from kayaking to signal a "thumbs-up" for Stooltime Counseling! Thanks, Laura! I appreciate it.</b><br />
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<strong>Orange is one of Gina's favorite colors. Being a dental hygienist comes second to being a wife and a mom as favorite things to do. Thanks for supporting Stooltime Counseling, Gina!</strong><br />
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<strong></strong><br />Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-68149056299789766682012-08-23T10:52:00.004-05:002021-05-30T16:19:04.863-05:00MARK S. ROGERS, LPC. CREDENTIALS:<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgv9Hoinp2NIIfifludKFDuS7MFjZ_6L-BFytpPBdSWXchpJ8gr834WzBU9IeXK_cRPwadZoudyU3b6BTaRGg4bE7jUkyrKm_XvOjKGtGISkoo1lMCfzsrJhdQ49LQLkfCa7rFhhTHKp7E/s1600/Oakland+University+MA+diploma+1988.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5779900136765629490" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgv9Hoinp2NIIfifludKFDuS7MFjZ_6L-BFytpPBdSWXchpJ8gr834WzBU9IeXK_cRPwadZoudyU3b6BTaRGg4bE7jUkyrKm_XvOjKGtGISkoo1lMCfzsrJhdQ49LQLkfCa7rFhhTHKp7E/s400/Oakland+University+MA+diploma+1988.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 300px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><strong>Meet Jake. He's a beautiful Labrador-German Shepherd-Mix rescue dog. He has a good home, and he's happy to be wearing a <span class="highlightNode">Stooltime Counseling</span> ball cap. Thanks, Jake!<br /><br /><br /></strong><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtsG4yDT70z7RbJDJCtK8cF4TYtpICuHQFoMaLjOfEqe23hJQZ0leMFmH24n1j3Odr9d6GVovfjkdyIPr-w6Rdoxq0_s9bDc266yNM8qmbAtQpv01_xYFcAsnhkeGPyNvV82R0u8N1fww/s1440/FB_IMG_1622130608374.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtsG4yDT70z7RbJDJCtK8cF4TYtpICuHQFoMaLjOfEqe23hJQZ0leMFmH24n1j3Odr9d6GVovfjkdyIPr-w6Rdoxq0_s9bDc266yNM8qmbAtQpv01_xYFcAsnhkeGPyNvV82R0u8N1fww/s320/FB_IMG_1622130608374.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXM72HUsgommOcEb1htX9F6QhAIvrx1LBmf4wBhJAI9fh-SjnpRc-qpYBt-hzNA-2tp5u8vpncmZ1I4c1fI821pAHolV1tiycpVF2QNKthLD_tOIRGjjuGRFl43THUXpIX5xgLaUu6VnM/s1080/FB_IMG_1622130628163.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXM72HUsgommOcEb1htX9F6QhAIvrx1LBmf4wBhJAI9fh-SjnpRc-qpYBt-hzNA-2tp5u8vpncmZ1I4c1fI821pAHolV1tiycpVF2QNKthLD_tOIRGjjuGRFl43THUXpIX5xgLaUu6VnM/s320/FB_IMG_1622130628163.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /></td></tr>
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Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-81210439991593714672012-03-25T19:39:00.051-05:002022-03-22T10:45:31.131-05:00STOOLTIME COUNSELING KEY FOBS<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHrHp42fne-DT0ErvqIoZWxBkbSKGTXvqqUxh5NAZYGwAuc6gJQA0XZ1HITW3TJ0lZk_i6fy4IaSQZ92f2H55uPAo5udLBlpCFNZHym2kOYeeqqhJYWR9tmN5Kr8pcM01KyGGK-Jj0YtY/s1600/STC+Key+Fob+1.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5724795655466722978" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHrHp42fne-DT0ErvqIoZWxBkbSKGTXvqqUxh5NAZYGwAuc6gJQA0XZ1HITW3TJ0lZk_i6fy4IaSQZ92f2H55uPAo5udLBlpCFNZHym2kOYeeqqhJYWR9tmN5Kr8pcM01KyGGK-Jj0YtY/s400/STC+Key+Fob+1.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 200px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjByP9PyrPbcasnQW6BO_dsOnCJILUaJMTrUxyn-Y26HxiFeDswJec8NUoaahsm0UDcdqJ9VWLnQdVQJHdYoESc8PIbwEsZmZFd3U6rln5b_fL-7EfnjMkZARTSrlnJq27syoG-qcymGQM/s1600/STC+Key+Fob+2.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5724795651593919698" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjByP9PyrPbcasnQW6BO_dsOnCJILUaJMTrUxyn-Y26HxiFeDswJec8NUoaahsm0UDcdqJ9VWLnQdVQJHdYoESc8PIbwEsZmZFd3U6rln5b_fL-7EfnjMkZARTSrlnJq27syoG-qcymGQM/s400/STC+Key+Fob+2.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 200px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><br />
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Stooltime Counseling Key Fobs. The cost for these Key Fobs, that hook onto any key chain & measure 2" X 1", is $1.00 (USD) if you also send me a self-addressed-stamped-envelope (SASE) with your order request. <br />
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The Stooltime Counseling Key Fobs function the same way as stress cards function. Stress chips on stress cards measure a person's hand temperature, which is a reflection of blood flow to the hand, which can be a yardstick of a stress response. The colder the hands, the more tension there is in the body. Other factors could contribute to having cold hands, and if that is the case, I would recommend seeing a doctor. Holding your thumb on the stress chip for ten seconds will measure your hand's temperature, and correlate it to a specific color. If the stress chip turns blue, it's an indication of feeling relaxed. If the chip stays black, it's an indication of a tense mood. There are other colors like green and red, and each of them correlates to a different mood.<br />
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The basic rule for interpreting temperature changes in the hands is simple. When the body's fight/flight response is activated under stress, the muscles tense, heart rate and the vital organs speed up, and as a result, blood flow is shunted from the hands (and feet) and directed to the vital organs to facilitate the increased level of arousal. The amount of temperature change depends on the stressor or problem and how a person responds to stress.<br />
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My logo is on the front of the key fob along with what I call the "Mood Yardstick" that correlates chip colors to moods. On the back, I recommend how a specific breathing technique can facilitate a relaxed mood as an alternative to the fight or flight response when feeling stressed.<br />
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Deep breathing has a profound effect on an increased heart rate when feeling stress. When done properly, the pulse rate slows and a sense of calm is achieved when coupled with thoughts that reframe the fight or flight response. It takes a conscious decision to initially practice deep breathing skills, but then it can become second nature the more it is practiced. The relaxation response starts with deep breathing. There is a time and a place when the fight or flight response is a more appropriate reaction to stress, but even then, deep breathing is key to managing a response to the situation. Any reaction to stress is a personal choice.<br />
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Stress can fall into two different categories: Distress and Eustress. Distressful situations are usually perceived as negative. Driving in rush hour traffic can be perceived as distressful. Eustressful situations are usually perceived as positive. A job promotion can be perceived as eustressful. In either case, the body's reaction to the stress doesn't know the difference. Blood flow in the body manages to find itself going to the vital organs to protect them under the perceived threat. In either event, properly doing deep breathing exercises can help start the redirection of the blood flow to the hands (and feet), and slow down the pulse rate, thereby helping to promote the start of a relaxation response.<br />
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Stooltime Counseling Key Fobs are one tool that can be used as a way to get bio-feedback for measuring stress levels in the body. There is a correlation between stress and body temperature. This tool can be used in conjunction with proper medical treatment from a health professional if necessary. The use of the STC Key Fobs is the sole choice of the reader, and not intended to be the only course of action to take in learning how to manage stress. It is a beginning, though. <br />
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Please send $1.00 (USD) and a self-addressed-stamped-envelope (SASE) to my P.O. Box address. As soon as I receive your request, I will mail yours to you. <br />
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<strong>Mark Rogers, LPC<br />P.O. Box 311<br />Anchorville, MI. 48004-0311</strong><br />
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Thank you,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(3/12).<br />
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<em><strong>I'm not saying the Detroit Tigers are endorsing the STC key fobs, nor am I saying they're using them. I'm just saying. Thank you!</strong></em><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipL6RWl5Ooj_wFRW0ndITnmUiUwdiUS9pkWWcFWmAb86XctYo6cVuQKhimT2GYOKNI6MpWErUi-9G8pbcxIDie9kQfkQ9U16TulTxEdnAaLcNWlmzHmswip2pSo_OOH26qvuqFDufk6OU/s1600/Detroit+Tigers+%2526+STC+key+fobs+6-6-12..jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5757751675534332210" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipL6RWl5Ooj_wFRW0ndITnmUiUwdiUS9pkWWcFWmAb86XctYo6cVuQKhimT2GYOKNI6MpWErUi-9G8pbcxIDie9kQfkQ9U16TulTxEdnAaLcNWlmzHmswip2pSo_OOH26qvuqFDufk6OU/s400/Detroit+Tigers+%2526+STC+key+fobs+6-6-12..jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 308px;" /></a><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDPs0DJWm2gub8BcCP4cuETF1r96CoTu4inqdb8UdT-FjdhvJXiiECqaUnAfL1_fcXXA2ScQBESRiup56su0o5SvlqK0Epbuf12fLEGBk-9s6rjeF_2nvNDu8hicA5CVDwQ-TOFgKbvBM/s1600/Detroit+Tigers+%2526+STC+key+fobs+2.+6-24-12..jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5757751491399595842" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDPs0DJWm2gub8BcCP4cuETF1r96CoTu4inqdb8UdT-FjdhvJXiiECqaUnAfL1_fcXXA2ScQBESRiup56su0o5SvlqK0Epbuf12fLEGBk-9s6rjeF_2nvNDu8hicA5CVDwQ-TOFgKbvBM/s400/Detroit+Tigers+%2526+STC+key+fobs+2.+6-24-12..jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 307px;" /></a>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyoPEeH32DUW7c8UPxkcbLRIwaDPCjU6f9LPHHwe6CV0GMAeQiTnX9BKQ2kCCQkZDG1on9sAYJYnjrO2oSZwQg3ii8ywwoHR3s7tqMv7QqkM7st8frOQ3uYiFjWIVEvQIZt2s4mypJxnk/s1600/2012+American+League+Pennant.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="176" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyoPEeH32DUW7c8UPxkcbLRIwaDPCjU6f9LPHHwe6CV0GMAeQiTnX9BKQ2kCCQkZDG1on9sAYJYnjrO2oSZwQg3ii8ywwoHR3s7tqMv7QqkM7st8frOQ3uYiFjWIVEvQIZt2s4mypJxnk/s400/2012+American+League+Pennant.jpg" width="392" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5yMm35oAM1nYrqEzVYWHgFfpm6VFwRwH9yMYPCSOmPAaoEZNgqAP0i5yMprYkg60eRk-p3pFf9zGNhweF2XmY-OGOKThsT6vu-BqUYvSpcfECWjZHB0ZIJdozPl-SdOAhWHzJWgQoh5g/s1600/Tigers+vs.+Giants+2012+World+Series..jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="168" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5yMm35oAM1nYrqEzVYWHgFfpm6VFwRwH9yMYPCSOmPAaoEZNgqAP0i5yMprYkg60eRk-p3pFf9zGNhweF2XmY-OGOKThsT6vu-BqUYvSpcfECWjZHB0ZIJdozPl-SdOAhWHzJWgQoh5g/s400/Tigers+vs.+Giants+2012+World+Series..jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
<b>In 2012, the Detroit Tigers were Central Division Champions, American League Pennant winners and played against the San Francisco Giants in the World Series. Congratulations! The team had an excellent run in 2012. Look out 2013!</b><div><b><br /></b></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyY0qUJDDEHT8C-Trk0xyfTiGaqhhlq7D1DGGWMO-0DTlJqZ6Py1-kP6Nd6R5Uqci5o6jcO2VjtiHPSv0LPpmSmrefKliUKswWEkV_ecA6os5AfNybC_2GjjCZg-9RgYhv5vN4rrLo0l48gNSPfa-kQOLmnQzkXGcEFG_ZARqXNgSAg8hb3nn65Omd/s4000/20220319_155446.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4000" data-original-width="1800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyY0qUJDDEHT8C-Trk0xyfTiGaqhhlq7D1DGGWMO-0DTlJqZ6Py1-kP6Nd6R5Uqci5o6jcO2VjtiHPSv0LPpmSmrefKliUKswWEkV_ecA6os5AfNybC_2GjjCZg-9RgYhv5vN4rrLo0l48gNSPfa-kQOLmnQzkXGcEFG_ZARqXNgSAg8hb3nn65Omd/s320/20220319_155446.jpg" width="144" /></a></div><b><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Meet Devon. She's a mom, Mixologist at an Eagles Club, wedding minister, entrepreneur/photographer/owner of Twisted Memories Photo Booth</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"> and a notary public. She describes herself as, "A jack of all trades, master of none." Well, Devon, you are masterfully showing your support for Stooltime Counseling, for which I am very appreciative. Thank you!</span><br /></b><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b><br /></b></div></div>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-33711825979947609192012-03-16T09:41:00.001-05:002019-02-10T23:02:26.640-05:00PRE-MARITAL COUNSELING<b><span style="color: #cc0000;">Preparing for the wedding day & preparing for marriage. There is a difference between one day and a lifetime.</span></b><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM2BN75X_r_jSMZd_BcoTS4k3OviHkIbyyNiGU9y0INTa_Fmw3He9NXMKvu7yyC-vvqFd_oaJecGT0xsnZklrLSrZAg04e_dymLUOSJHCiVFEcdvujny0nTzw69t7_F7LRvor1_Wetw9Y/s1600/Fr.+Tim.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM2BN75X_r_jSMZd_BcoTS4k3OviHkIbyyNiGU9y0INTa_Fmw3He9NXMKvu7yyC-vvqFd_oaJecGT0xsnZklrLSrZAg04e_dymLUOSJHCiVFEcdvujny0nTzw69t7_F7LRvor1_Wetw9Y/s1600/Fr.+Tim.png" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Fr. Tim Birney</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgusKgZy5cRGEzZkqVwyAo38YcilrXWqKvXsATn6k5GjXSH6CoVf0xmlcL31GTDFYtFhAVXCnO5XmvIcdj_Swva8R_IaRtWA3s-LDGA2rSMXh848f9pyoghgHmaoN7zqhXBszUHIyTK_rQ/s1600/Fr.+Jim.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgusKgZy5cRGEzZkqVwyAo38YcilrXWqKvXsATn6k5GjXSH6CoVf0xmlcL31GTDFYtFhAVXCnO5XmvIcdj_Swva8R_IaRtWA3s-LDGA2rSMXh848f9pyoghgHmaoN7zqhXBszUHIyTK_rQ/s1600/Fr.+Jim.png" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Fr. Jim Lopez</td></tr>
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<strong>Between 2003-2010, I worked with Fr. Tim Birney and Fr. Jim Lopez as a pre-marital counselor at Holy Cross, St. Catherine and St. Mark churches near Marine City, MI. It was one of the most rewarding professional experiences I have had since becoming a Licensed Professional Counselor in 1990. As of this writing, both men have moved-on to new assignments: Fr. Tim is director of priestly vocations, and Fr. Jim is administrator at St. Damian parish, but the seven combined years I worked side-by-side with them have enriched my faith in all matters related to church and family.</strong><br />
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<strong>It was an honor to work with both priests and to reinforce their values to each and every couple who wanted to participate in the sacrament of marriage at Holy Cross, St. Catherine and St. Mark churches. Thank you!</strong><br />
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There is a difference between a job, a passion and a calling. A job is something we do to earn money so we can keep the lights on at home. A passion is something we do because we feel excited about doing it. A calling is something we do that has spiritual connotations attached to it; it's like a ministry. Working as a pre-marital counselor between the years 2003 -2010 at Holy Cross, St. Mark and St. Catherine churches, my job and passion were my ministry, or gift, to pre-marital couples. I used my counseling skills to minister to over 100 pre-marital couples.<br />
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Pre-marital counseling is a powerful thing to see. How does a couple meet? How has their relationship developed? What are their plans for the future? What does it mean to each person to be called to a new vocation through the sacrament of marriage? As each couple would talk about how they would use their gifts to build and develop their marriage, it was a pleasure to hear couples talk about their happy beginnings of a new family.What does it take for two people to get ready for marriage? For two people who are serious about their decision, the answer might be, "Whatever it takes!" It is that type of commitment that makes my work as a pre-marital counselor such a joy!<br />
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One of the most important recommendations I conveyed to each pre-marital couple is the concept of <strong>ACKNOWLEDGING AND VALIDATING</strong> each other every day. It is the difference between practicing selfish love and selfless love.<br />
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Selfish love separates each person from the other, whereas, selfless love means we take care of ourselves and each other. Selfish love is dishonest. It can bend the truth and lie. "It's all about me." On the other hand, selfless love is about giving rather than taking. "It's all about us." When each person acknowledges and validates the other, you communicate an understanding of what your partner is thinking, feeling and doing. <br />
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The top four risk factors for divorce: Problems with the in-laws, problems with money, religious differences and different styles of parenting the kids. Recommendations to lower the risks:<br />
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1) The in-laws: "Your family is important to me because you're important to me."
</ul>
<ul>2) Money: Financial fidelity means a couple is on the same page with spending, acts of charity and savings habits.
<br />
</ul>
<ul>3) Religious differences: Spiritually grow by challenging intellectual arrogance and trusting any differences.<br />
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4) Kids and discipline: Avoid the "good-cop, bad-cop" approach. As parents, support each other's decisions.<br />
</ul>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0T79GgPgxKtlqQmVcaFtsOipwx3eiPJw4enJbdA0Al16ORBxRnrg4gMVsn_bB_GdXw-IYLi9cG1Hd7YMbR2qI2wxTKVborfKjdqESa8zdMQwf2IbwaNT3asuly2nfnheKG8IkN_MCmkU/s1600/Safe+Sex..jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0T79GgPgxKtlqQmVcaFtsOipwx3eiPJw4enJbdA0Al16ORBxRnrg4gMVsn_bB_GdXw-IYLi9cG1Hd7YMbR2qI2wxTKVborfKjdqESa8zdMQwf2IbwaNT3asuly2nfnheKG8IkN_MCmkU/s320/Safe+Sex..jpg" /></a></div>
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<div class="text_exposed_root text_exposed" id="id_5c60f2160edc68f57497078">
<strong>Short Story:</strong><br />
In honor of National Marriage Day, observed on the 2nd Sunday in February every year, here's a story about three kids deciding to play, "Wedding Day. "<br />
<br />
One kid is playing the priest. The other two are playing the bride and the groom. <br />
<br />
The mom noticed her children playing the game and chuckled when she overheard the priest say to the groom, "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be used against you."</div>
<strong></strong><br />
<strong>Article under construction ...</strong><br />
<strong></strong><br />
<strong></strong><br />
<strong>Written by,</strong><br />
<strong>Mark Rogers, LPC.</strong><br />
<strong>Licensed Professional Counselor.</strong><br />
<strong>(11/12).</strong>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-73575468579887624642012-02-04T00:53:00.048-05:002021-05-30T16:20:41.353-05:00MANAGING THE TRAJECTORY OF YOUR LIFE!<strong>Webster's definition of "trajectory":</strong> <br />
<em>"A path, progression, or line of development resembling a physical trajectory."</em><br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKRTUzn82lqLsP43SzeFkp-F9uie-S7wLSO4v00In3Txt0vCxGTRjswceF7VNYCkVfxTlfdeMgSAL8WaXlXW7EQPivua4xyUrlN_bI1mWb6nSHeNENWw4QPfgi18p5uUjCMm9eyEdgsEY/s1600/Emmanuel+Lewis+as+Webster.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5705292269588784546" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKRTUzn82lqLsP43SzeFkp-F9uie-S7wLSO4v00In3Txt0vCxGTRjswceF7VNYCkVfxTlfdeMgSAL8WaXlXW7EQPivua4xyUrlN_bI1mWb6nSHeNENWw4QPfgi18p5uUjCMm9eyEdgsEY/s320/Emmanuel+Lewis+as+Webster.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 194px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 259px;" /></a><strong>Not this Webster. This is Emmanuel Lewis, who played Webster in a 1980's TV sitcom. I meant the dictionary.</strong><br />
<br />
The word, "trajectory," used in a sentence: The path of a projectile is called its trajectory. <br />
<br />
A familiar example of a trajectory is the path a baseball takes as it is thrown. <br />
<br />
A less familiar example, from a Stooltime Counseling perspective, is the path one's life takes as projectiles are thrown at it.<br />
<br />
The inspiration for this article comes from my FaceBook friend, Sandy, who asked me to comment on a picture she posted:<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8uLrr094eGCkBBaCrLDZNOWdTecp6vazzVHIETlYcajG7ea16th7l2d2jB4gI44WYJpxa_SWVqwyX_9jsQGrjb4INXygRiILo47QU-cZBqSU5R9a_havyonrxdN7uV2-oTVMmz9Ve4Yo/s1600/JFK.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5705166327826688402" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8uLrr094eGCkBBaCrLDZNOWdTecp6vazzVHIETlYcajG7ea16th7l2d2jB4gI44WYJpxa_SWVqwyX_9jsQGrjb4INXygRiILo47QU-cZBqSU5R9a_havyonrxdN7uV2-oTVMmz9Ve4Yo/s320/JFK.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a><strong>Here were my responses:</strong><br />
<br />
I liked JFK, who also said, "Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country." Those sounded like conservative values for a president who was a democrat.<br />
<br />
Also, I think it is a person's circumstances and personal choices that determine if someone is going to be poor or not. We live in a country that affords tremendous opportunities for people who want to go after them. Projectiles like a poor education, drug addiction or living in a multi-level dysfunctional family don't help, but can be overcome to increase one's chances of prospering. At least the opportunity to do it is greater in America than anywhere else, in my opinion. Despite some of the cultural problems that still need to be overcome, America is a country where bondage, tyranny and oppression are dirty words. All people are created equal; what happens after that is a personal choice.<br />
<br />
Social justice seems to be geared toward everybody being equal. While we are all equal in the eyes of our Creator, after we're born we all make choices that differentiate us from one another. Living with our choices then becomes the hard part, whether we're rich or poor.<br />
<br />
<strong>Professional Opinion:</strong><br />
Projectiles like a poor education, drug addiction or living in a multi-level dysfunctional family do not need to remain as barriers to realizing one's human potential. There is help to explore, understand and change one's path in life so it can feel more satisfying.<br />
<br />
If lack of satisfaction with life is based on: 1) Receiving no education or poor education, 2) Being addicted to drugs, or 3) Coming from a family that has traumatized you by way of abuse or neglect, it is time to stop the vicious cycle. In the 21st century, there is no need to pass on generational lifestyles like these. Rather, it is time to become empowered, based on making some different choices and decisions. It could mean the difference between being content and connected to society and being a malcontent, who is disconnected from society.<br />
<br />
Much poverty in America is based on the above three examples. Having a disability can also contribute to living in poverty, based on statistics from the Department of Human Services and Social Security Administration, but for the purpose of this article, I want to focus on poor education, drug addiction and coming from a multi-level dysfunctional family.<br />
<br />
<strong>Poor Education:</strong><br />
Some people would say schools are the last line of defense a society has to prepare kids to compete in the world as they enter adulthood. This is especially true if the student comes from a home where the parents are derelict in their duties as a parent. Others might say schools are a vehicle used to teach students they are "special" by showing them they can be winners, but at the risk of implying the message: Failure is not an option. How can schools prepare kids to compete, achieve, accomplish, think/feel/act for themselves, give back to the community, manage success and failure and excel? This is the question I have as I wrestle to define the difference between a poor education and one that provides kids with the skills it takes to compete, achieve, accomplish, think/feel/act for themselves, give back to the community, manage success and failure and excel. When a student learns these skills, an important lesson is learned. Being "special" is something that is earned as opposed to thinking it is something to which a person is entitled.<br />
<br />
<strong>Drug Addiction:</strong><br />
People smoking marijuana, injecting heroin, snorting cocaine, popping pills or binging on alcohol is nothing new. Throughout history, people have looked for different ways to alter consciousness. A drug culture tends to defy convention and reject the values of the mainstream culture. This is called, <a href="https://www.mtholyoke.edu/courses/rschwart/hist255-s01/boheme/evolution.html" target="_blank">"The Bohemian Counter Culture",</a> and its participants include people from every socio-economic status because it is a human problem, not limited to any one group. Alcohol abuse, prescription drug abuse, or illicit drug abuse sometimes has an insidious effect on the mind and body; other times, like behavior can develop into a physical compulsion, which means an addiction has quickly developed. When drug abuse negatively effects a person's ability to function, a person has at least two choices: 1) Continue to participate in the Bohemian Counter Culture, so to speak, and seek support from like minded people, or 2) Get some help and learn to commit to relapse prevention. Other times, the solution can be found somewhere in-between the two choices, but usually not when there is a physical addiction or psychological dependence that develops as a result of using a mind-altering substance.<br />
<br />
How does anyone who has an addiction to drugs, including alcohol, side-step this projectile to change the trajectory? When there is a physical compulsion to use a substance, it is difficult to be honest with self and others. It is easier to deny or minimize a problem than it is to be honest about it before confronting it. A physical compulsion to use is a problem. Can relationships play a key role in the recovery process? Yes. Generally speaking, the earlier a family member or friend can set-up an intervention for someone with a drug problem, the easier it is to change trajectory. To get started, it is important to understand the five stages of change, the process involved in getting from point A (sick, non-functional, denial of problem, actively using drugs) to point B (commitment to relapse prevention).<br />
<br />
<strong>Stages Of Change:</strong><br />
<span style="color: red;">Pre-contemplation: </span><span style="color: black;">In this stage of change, a person is resistant to changing any thoughts or behaviors that could lead to a commitment to relapse prevention. It is the time before a person recognizes there is a problem. A person has no need to change, nor is there a belief that change can happen. A person in this stage of change is in the state of denial of a problem. Why change when the belief is the drug use has more benefits than risks attached to it? Confronting a person with a drug problem is a denial trap for the person because it is natural to feel defensive when being confronted. Helping someone transition from this stage of change to the next requires empathy, the absence of argumentation, rolling with their resistance and supporting their self-efficacy. It is not-so-good to ask, "You don't have a drinking problem, do you?" It is better to ask, "How would you describe your attitude about alcohol?" It is not-so-good to ask, "Aren't you worried about how your drug use affects your kids?" It is better to ask, "What do your kids think about your drug use? How is it affecting them?" What motivates people, who are stuck in the pre-contemplative stage, is to help a person begin to realize a need for change and a belief that change can happen. It usually never helps to lecture a person about a drug problem. It is more effective to engage a person in a discussion about a drug problem.</span><br />
<span style="color: red;"></span><br />
<span style="color: red;">Contemplation: </span><span style="color: #20124d;">In this stage of change, a person is aware a problem exists, but there is no commitment to take action. This stage of change is characterized by ambivalence, but insight of the problem behavior is increased.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: red;">Preparation: </span><span style="color: #20124d;">In this stage of change, there is an intention to take action. The problem is recognized and plans are being made to make change.</span><br />
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<span style="color: red;">Action: </span><span style="color: #20124d;">In this stage of change, a person modifies their behavior. Old behaviors are replaced by new ones. Change begins to take place. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: red;">Maintenance: </span><span style="color: #20124d;">In this stage of change, the new behaviors that replaced the old ones create sustained change for many months and years. A person has learned a lesson from any relapse that may have occurred along the way that helps to sustain the new behaviors that are healthier than the old behaviors. Change is maintained long-term.</span><br />
<span style="color: #20124d;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #20124d;"><strong>Determining readiness for drug rehabilitation:</strong></span><br />
<strong><span style="color: #20124d;"></span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="color: #20124d;">1) Have you thought you want to cut down on your drinking or drug use?</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="color: #20124d;"></span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="color: #20124d;">2) Have people annoyed you by criticizing your drinking or drug use?</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="color: #20124d;"></span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="color: #20124d;">3) Have you ever felt upset or guilty about your drinking or drug use?</span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="color: #20124d;"></span></strong><br />
<strong><span style="color: #20124d;">If you answered "yes" to two of the three above questions, it is possible that there may be a problem worth exploring in counseling.</span></strong><br />
<br />
<strong>Multi-Level Dysfunctional Family:</strong><br />
The difference between a house and a home is a family. A home unites people. It is a place where personalities are nourished, talents developed, values are taught and hospitality towards others is learned. A family teaches each person there is unity with all people of goodwill. <br />
<br />
Then there is the type of family that puts the "fun" in dysfunctional. Well, not really. Not too many people view family dysfunction as fun because dysfunction can lead to feelings of hurt and estrangement. It takes a lot of insight and understanding to cope with the hurt and estrangement. If the goal is to forgive people who have hurt you, it's important to first deal with the hurt.<br />
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I use the term, "multi-level", because it is usually not correct to say, "I come from a dysfunctional family." The ability to function happens on multiple levels, not just one. To be specific, a family may function financially, but not emotionally. In this example, two levels are defined. When multiple levels are involved, the odds of skirting this projectile decrease without help. <br />
<br />
Sometimes bad things happen to good people. A dysfunctional family environment can be traumatic. People who experience trauma experience brain changes. But there is hope. A trauma survivor can build new, healthy pathways in the brain by shifting his/her thinking, feelings and behaviors. Counseling can help.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
To be continued ... <br />
<br />
Written by,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(2/12).<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDMHUT8ihOeyqC8Iphf_u_xWcKA-eyTfzNtP-Wb6X6ptBPUB39md_oVtzB0Ex8nvpqCt4zoMAbcuk4NxEYaj66O5TRkqkLYYgI6Up-tr45OttLZGRF-OyRdDyXAfb0fknDVDD15oxActs/s1600/100_0410.JPG"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5778065141186252754" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDMHUT8ihOeyqC8Iphf_u_xWcKA-eyTfzNtP-Wb6X6ptBPUB39md_oVtzB0Ex8nvpqCt4zoMAbcuk4NxEYaj66O5TRkqkLYYgI6Up-tr45OttLZGRF-OyRdDyXAfb0fknDVDD15oxActs/s320/100_0410.JPG" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a><strong>Thank you, Jenny, for showing some love for Stooltime Counseling at the 2012 Balloon Festival in Marysville, Ohio!</strong><div><strong><br /></strong></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyMz0qlYdnoqNzF6sGsB10i6cxTgfxnHy9ec1BCzgkngUuEEKneeRij5exJGeUYROpsCKf9KGZnwnZ8ZzVopz02LIgvoJTmmguO55_Hx0RPCenscqGk9HdCsLMA-hNkD8OepQ3PgsoYSA/s1921/FB_IMG_1622130580932.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1921" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyMz0qlYdnoqNzF6sGsB10i6cxTgfxnHy9ec1BCzgkngUuEEKneeRij5exJGeUYROpsCKf9KGZnwnZ8ZzVopz02LIgvoJTmmguO55_Hx0RPCenscqGk9HdCsLMA-hNkD8OepQ3PgsoYSA/s320/FB_IMG_1622130580932.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxEa7MB21B1Ru5ekBO6-RdcuXz8IWSXf869MrMNcHB2hXxTeMFpvziddhd5P5FRkOWURDkih-AgokOEw8dpMbwuQGslaqfObB2oOWm906d45GJaVpD4zbfRVvSwyW8tgShnMGF2GPolOM/s1080/FB_IMG_1622130555283.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxEa7MB21B1Ru5ekBO6-RdcuXz8IWSXf869MrMNcHB2hXxTeMFpvziddhd5P5FRkOWURDkih-AgokOEw8dpMbwuQGslaqfObB2oOWm906d45GJaVpD4zbfRVvSwyW8tgShnMGF2GPolOM/s320/FB_IMG_1622130555283.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><strong><br /></strong></div>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-24166767100959076502011-11-11T08:54:00.049-05:002022-07-19T21:19:02.419-05:00MUSICAL CHAIRS: WHERE WILL YOU BE WHEN THE MUSIC STOPS?<p><strong>The Importance Of Being Prepared!</strong>
Musical chairs is a game people play to win. Players must be ready for anything when the music stops. It is a game that requires players to walk around a row of chairs while listening to music. When the music stops, the goal is to grab a chair and sit down. Since there is always one less chair than players, someone gets excluded from the next round. Repeat the process until there is one winner. It takes listening skills, timing and preparation to win. Where will you be when the music stops?
Being prepared for the choices we make in life means getting ready to grab a chair when the music stops. The chair just might be a three-legged stool!
<strong>Some Examples:</strong>
Coaches stress the importance of individual and team preparation before the next game. Prepare to win!
Students who want to show and tell their teachers what they have learned in class prepare by studying and doing their homework. Prepare to pass that test!
Pre-marital couples who plan to marry know the importance of doing more preparation for their marriage than for their wedding day. Prepare to read, <a href="http://stooltimecounseling.blogspot.com/2007/02/marriage-theres-nothing-like-it.html">R.U.S.T.I.C.</a> approach to marriage.
<strong>Boy Scout Law. A scout is:</strong>
Trustworthy
Loyal
Helpful
Friendly
Courteous
Kind
Obedient
Cheerful
Thrifty
Brave
Clean
Reverent
<em><strong>Boy Scout motto: Be Prepared</strong>!</em>
Espousing the 12 values taught to boy scouts puts the "fun" in "functional" activities of daily living! Prepare to function.
People who want to have a nest egg at the time of their retirement learn how to save and invest part of their income during their industrial years. Prepare to have money when gainful employment is no longer an option!
People who have healthy religious feelings live their lives in ways that prepare them for something for which we are all born: the death penalty. The desire to go to our heavenly home after we leave this world takes preparation here on earth. Prepare to live.
Whether it be preparing to win a sporting event, pass a test, increase emotional intimacy in a marriage, function, save money for retirement or live, preparation may not always get us what we want, but it will get us anything better than lack of preparation.
Now, can someone start the music?
Written by,
Mark Rogers, LPC.
Licensed Professional Counselor
(11/11).
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8eVYknt3YavWTDxtUvWQS3ek6tVZ8ahOaIQ-FNkxrzVrZAdV_6Ep3Zf7CxdbKPaKcntOifL7a12Kj9KkXqz2zimFT59efXgVFf0nDBk4Ed9yt833HPjbcHljoQbHqprY1t_91TRWX0HA/s1600/Michele.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5697772739699258690" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8eVYknt3YavWTDxtUvWQS3ek6tVZ8ahOaIQ-FNkxrzVrZAdV_6Ep3Zf7CxdbKPaKcntOifL7a12Kj9KkXqz2zimFT59efXgVFf0nDBk4Ed9yt833HPjbcHljoQbHqprY1t_91TRWX0HA/s320/Michele.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a><strong>To a woman whose friendship I cherish. Thanks for supporting Stooltime Counseling, Michele!</strong></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj08EiMW9yGNCY5NmUuuvw8bOGVP-YA1J6OGw7xfekOaOhCi8PiTD4LkTeIzuJVCUT427x9TQ8p-d76CNz5-NZpMNdOsUs2N__WHGUkFG47PlEDDOzyNMq59Y7tU_dxDW63lr5waBlTYQVRb9jl76Ck7VW61Nc-g-msoBjAD-X672UiyVv19W6smN1/s1873/BrianAmanda.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1873" data-original-width="843" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj08EiMW9yGNCY5NmUuuvw8bOGVP-YA1J6OGw7xfekOaOhCi8PiTD4LkTeIzuJVCUT427x9TQ8p-d76CNz5-NZpMNdOsUs2N__WHGUkFG47PlEDDOzyNMq59Y7tU_dxDW63lr5waBlTYQVRb9jl76Ck7VW61Nc-g-msoBjAD-X672UiyVv19W6smN1/w180-h400/BrianAmanda.jpg" width="180" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; text-align: start; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b>Many thanks to Brian and Amanda for taking this moment to show their support for Stooltime Counseling. Amanda is an Optician. The "eyes" have it, Amanda. Both of you look great! Thank you!</b></span></div><p></p>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-87965740055375932332011-11-04T11:33:00.045-05:002014-04-06T23:29:58.235-05:00TRUST IS A MUST OR YOUR GAME IS A BUST!<strong>THIS PHRASE RINGS TRUE IN BOWLING AND IN LIFE</strong><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqUQaldXmPrGWvLQYODPkd7rCv8pvvOQMmcN3K90278hBfvyrrnQCukYWBy_lKJ_uWf3yBkNEazlXgIRzs_X3uTbJr7ULFVfbeZKiD8l-7EpYpu1KOh8tB7-0_D5xu1B4vPTSho7WP3N8/s1600/Friday+Night+Mens+League.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqUQaldXmPrGWvLQYODPkd7rCv8pvvOQMmcN3K90278hBfvyrrnQCukYWBy_lKJ_uWf3yBkNEazlXgIRzs_X3uTbJr7ULFVfbeZKiD8l-7EpYpu1KOh8tB7-0_D5xu1B4vPTSho7WP3N8/s400/Friday+Night+Mens+League.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5671180447828668482" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 300px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><strong><em>Left to Right: Kevin Wojcik, Harry Sullins, Gary Morris, Mark Rogers, Dean Pitruzzello, Bill Sellers, Joe Petrone and Arnie Goldman. (Missing from team picture is Pat Einechner). Thanks for supporting Stooltime Counseling!</em></strong><br />
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Trust occurs on many different levels. It can happen when greeting another person by way of a handshake, which is a welcoming sign of friendliness, hospitality and trust. It happens when a man and a woman exchange wedding vows. Trusting oneself and other drivers is evident anytime we get behind the wheel of a car to drive, lest we feel nervous and paranoid during that trip from point A to point B. Then there's the game of bowling. Most bowlers learn the importance of trusting their ball once it leaves their hand and lands on the spot where it then most likely travels to the end of the lane to knock down as many pins as possible. Then again, sometimes a handshake, exchange of wedding vows, an accident-free driving trip and bowling score show less than positive results, despite the amount of trust shown. When things go wrong as they sometimes do, I'm reminded of something once said by President Ronald Reagan. To paraphrase, 'It's easier to trust when you can verify.' The words blend well with the theme of this article, "Trust is a must or your game is a bust!"<br />
<br />
My research suggests Professional Bowlers Association (PBA) legend, Billy Welu, coined the phrase, "Trust is a must or your game is a bust," during his tenure on television as the color commentator next to Chris Schenkel on early PBA telecasts, circa 1960's. "Hit 'em thin and watch 'em spin," was another one of his favorite phrases. ABC Sports did a nice job promoting the game of bowling in the 20th century. ESPN Sports has taken over the reins in the 21st century.<br />
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<br />
<strong>Ten In The Pit!</strong><br />
How does a bowler get the blueprint to throw a strike? A strike in the game of bowling is knocking down all ten pins with the bowling ball on the first ball of each frame. There are ten frames in every game, and twelve opportunities to bowl a strike. Twelve strikes in a row is a perfect game: 300. I say the answer is very similar to how any person gets the blueprint to achieve their human potential. One way to do it can be explained this way: Know yourself, trust yourself, choose yourself. Lets do the math!<br />
<br />
<strong>Know yourself:</strong><br />
Pete Weber, bowling champion, posed this question in 2012 after winning a tournament: <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9yvvSy7AIpI">"Who do you think you are? I am."</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNA1vRSh3v4MNd-1LGAHCnYv-QkTGyWs1hAtRSOadBod-EuZHB6XwGT4XMsatZYj2plW_pWzLNYPweVLC6AY-HJOwYlCdYRhnjTh648bSnqobaa0CSMVb-zMFbSAEQMzh2BsafzjJytNI/s1600/Pete+Weber..jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNA1vRSh3v4MNd-1LGAHCnYv-QkTGyWs1hAtRSOadBod-EuZHB6XwGT4XMsatZYj2plW_pWzLNYPweVLC6AY-HJOwYlCdYRhnjTh648bSnqobaa0CSMVb-zMFbSAEQMzh2BsafzjJytNI/s320/Pete+Weber..jpg" /></a></div>
Then, there's Admiral James Stockdale, who asked these questions at the outset of the 1992 Vice Presidential debate: <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uKpX-5jQjQ0">"Who am I? Why am I here?"</a><br />
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After viewing these two short videos of two different gentlemen asking the questions we all want to know about ourselves, I can only surmise, the answer will be different for each of us.<br />
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<strong>Trust yourself:</strong><br />
Trust what you think, feel and do. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Mastering one lesson allows us to move onto the next one.<br />
<br />
<strong>Choose yourself:</strong><br />
Choosing yourself starts with a mental exercise that answers the following questions:<br />
1) Where am I? Here.<br />
2) What time is it? Now.<br />
3) What am I? The moment.<br />
<br />
<strong>Trust this: Bowl one frame, not the game!</strong><br />
Whether it's a game of bowling, one frame at a time, or living a mindful life, one task at a time, choose being aware of the here & now every moment. Life's journey is more memorable and meaningful than the destination. Your bowling scores just might improve, too!<br />
<br />
Written by,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(11/11).<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/omxdb6selTA?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<strong>Stooltime Counseling visits Kevin Wojcik's Pro Shop with Harry Sullins. Watch how a bowling ball gets professionally drilled. In baseball, three strikes and you're out. In bowling, three strikes will put you ahead! Kevin's Pro Shop is located in Roseville, MI. Thanks, gentlemen!</strong><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiS4Qkmu4twZiyOxWXgmTe35ZZb2DDHrCAHcUvysBGSB1fgnU751LQMSEuGJG9txzvQLSw0pBeTciLyNNUfEpF1X9EjKMa_AX5dzo9kkZfjlYe06Q_DYSCBg0Fa5T1y-uPRz6CxKtn9IB8/s1600/Sat.+night+bold+ones+1.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiS4Qkmu4twZiyOxWXgmTe35ZZb2DDHrCAHcUvysBGSB1fgnU751LQMSEuGJG9txzvQLSw0pBeTciLyNNUfEpF1X9EjKMa_AX5dzo9kkZfjlYe06Q_DYSCBg0Fa5T1y-uPRz6CxKtn9IB8/s400/Sat.+night+bold+ones+1.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5671754920701013634" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 247px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><strong>Saturday Night Bold Ones league, 2011-2012, Team Stooltime Counseling. I will admit it: I really enjoy bowling!</strong><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIXjSovgxwPgt_UtTd_32Uk1KC01XPi__MrMZZF1aoZlouvTTVZBSrOIJt4mUm8TgFU_GgKv6_x2eSRaDub8MEuGSReLVePm9r6uAoFAVkbzrW4kTistONA_5TZ_-K9Y679RJHt1REHGU/s1600/100_0577.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIXjSovgxwPgt_UtTd_32Uk1KC01XPi__MrMZZF1aoZlouvTTVZBSrOIJt4mUm8TgFU_GgKv6_x2eSRaDub8MEuGSReLVePm9r6uAoFAVkbzrW4kTistONA_5TZ_-K9Y679RJHt1REHGU/s400/100_0577.JPG" height="300" width="400" /></a></div>
<b>This is professional bowler, teammate and friend, Harry Sullins. Thanks for supporting Stooltime Counseling! </b><br />
<b></b><br />
<b><u>Hall of Fame member with:</u></b><br />
<b>1) Michigan State Bowling Association (MSBA). </b><br />
<b>2) Metro Detroit United States Bowling Congress (MDUSBC). </b><br />
<b>3) Michigan Majors Bowling Association (MMBA). </b><br />
<b></b><br />
<b><u>Major Accomplishments to date (January, 2013):</u></b><br />
<b>* Five Pro Bowlers Association (PBA) tour championships.</b><br />
<b>* Three PBA50 tour championships.</b><br />
<b>* Twenty One PBA Regional/PBA50 tour championships.</b><br />
<b>* 1990 World Open championship (Finland).</b><br />
<b>* PBA Tour Ironman.</b><br />
<b>* 55 - 300 games.</b><br />
<b>* 19 - 299 games.</b><br />
<b>* 27 - 800 series.</b><br />
<b>* 4 - MDUSBC championships.</b><br />
<b>* 3 - MSUSBC championships.</b><br />
<b></b><br />
<b>When asked his interpretation of, "Trust is a must or your game is a bust," Harry responded, "Have faith with your personal/physical/mental game. Set your goals and take the right path to get them. Strive to be good/better, and you can achieve your goals." And lastly, "Do not chase two rabbits at one time or both will escape!"</b>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-14336079573708095412010-11-27T02:11:00.016-05:002021-05-30T16:23:20.092-05:00GRIEF: HOW CAN YOU HELP ME?<strong>Grief can come in many forms. The loss of a loved one through death, the loss of our youth as we grow older, the loss of a spouse through divorce or the grief a person feels as their lifestyle changes for whatever reason.</strong>
<strong>After experiencing the death of a loved one, survivors grieve the loss. Selfishly, the death is a reminder of our own mortality. Selflessly, it truly hurts because the person will be missed. There is no one-way to grieve. People grieve the way they need to grieve. What helps one person may not help another, everybody is different.</strong>
<strong>As awkward as it feels to relate to somebody who has experienced the loss of a loved one, here are some insights that may help. It is not an all-inclusive list. Everybody is different.</strong>
<strong>ONE PERSPECTIVE:</strong>
<em>Please talk about him/her, even though he/she is gone. It is more comforting to cry than to pretend that he/she never existed. I need to talk about him/her, and I need to do it over and over.</em>
<em>Be patient with my agitation. Nothing feels secure in my world. Accept the fact that I may cry from time-to-time. Sadness hits me in waves, and I never know when my tears may flow. Just sit with me in silence and hold my hand.</em>
<em>If you tell me what I should be doing, I may feel even more lost and alone. I feel anguish that he/she is dead, so please don't make it worse by telling me I'm doing this incorrectly.</em>
<em>I am not strong. I'm just numb. If you tell me that I should be strong, I think that you don't see me.</em>
<em>Just because I look good does not mean that I feel good. Ask me how I feel only if you really have time to listen.</em>
<em>I don't understand what you mean when you say, "You've got to get on with your life". My life is going on. I've been forced to take on many new responsibilities and roles. It may not look the way you think it should. This will take time and I will never be my old self again. So please, just love me as I am today, and know that with your love and support, the joy will slowly return to my life. But I will never forget and there will always be times when I cry.</em>
<em>Grief is not like having a cold or the flu. They are different. My grieving may only begin 2 months after his/her death. Don't think that I will be over it in a year. I am not only grieving his/her death, but also the person I was when I was with him/her, the life that we shared, the plans we had, the places we will never get to go together, and the hopes, dreams and desires that will never come true. My whole world has been crushed and I will never be the same.</em>
<em>I will not always be grieving as intensely, but I will never forget him/her, and rather than recover, I want to incorporate his/her life and love into the rest of my life. He/she is a part of me and always will be, and sometimes I will remember him/her with joy and other times with a tear. Both are okay.</em>
<em>I don't have to accept the death. Yes, I have to understand that it has happened and it is real, but there are some things in life that are just not acceptable.</em>
<em>Please don't say, "Call me if you need anything". I'll never call you because I have no idea what I need. Trying to figure out what you could do for me takes more energy than I have.</em>
<em>Understand how difficult it is for me to be surrounded by couples, to walk into events alone, to go home alone, to feel out of place in the same situations where I used to feel so comfortable.</em>
<em>Please don't judge me now - or think that I'm behaving strangely. Remember, I'm grieving. I am in shock. I am afraid. I feel deep rage. I feel guilty. Above all, I hurt. I'm experiencing a pain unlike any I've ever felt before. The pain is so profound, it is difficult to imagine how deeply it hurts.</em>
<em>Don't worry if you think I'm getting better and then suddenly I seem to slip backward. I behave that way sometimes. Please don't tell me you know how I feel, or that it's time for me to get on with my life. What I need now is time to grieve.</em>
<em>Most of all, thank you for being my friend. Thank you for your patience. Thank you for caring. Thank you for helping, for understanding from a distance. Thank you for praying for me.</em>
<em>Remember in the days or years ahead, after you experience a loss - when you need me as I have needed you - I will understand from a distance. Then I will come and be with you.</em>
Written by,
Anonymous
Mark Rogers, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
(11/10)<div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRch4qN6t6nr3HhMhsD3P2i1apvYt2uiu2vdbK7Ox8yLT7VFtrnXAPaHU-XlNoxCKexv7RdaJ0ML49dovd_nBGYEboLqKs1Tg1HgI08G5xPKDWGGV6w4BSWyPwzsvdhmNfUjDfjeHzpSA/s1440/FB_IMG_1622130538160.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRch4qN6t6nr3HhMhsD3P2i1apvYt2uiu2vdbK7Ox8yLT7VFtrnXAPaHU-XlNoxCKexv7RdaJ0ML49dovd_nBGYEboLqKs1Tg1HgI08G5xPKDWGGV6w4BSWyPwzsvdhmNfUjDfjeHzpSA/s320/FB_IMG_1622130538160.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGI-NzdTFaArov8l6ZHZNPIK5IDrRPyys37yd6vU32YQOqudPxRm2kgwH4a_nE7ZZq4qKmYUGA7cidRjLLEaQa4v45QEx7U68HZ5NsjqU6FqzNEc-FU25sab5_S4G1x41y-cSZFaYiwcM/s1440/FB_IMG_1622130524853.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGI-NzdTFaArov8l6ZHZNPIK5IDrRPyys37yd6vU32YQOqudPxRm2kgwH4a_nE7ZZq4qKmYUGA7cidRjLLEaQa4v45QEx7U68HZ5NsjqU6FqzNEc-FU25sab5_S4G1x41y-cSZFaYiwcM/s320/FB_IMG_1622130524853.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwz2Gk3nODWdrSlYxaXRaAIZX5at52Q_Aw12xo7cxqh1Q8JuOXn4TGDjQ0hVfmwajufV6YnqDl84cnfUErO5ae5KcAcYQ5OTSG-uh2gh-GPEC7Ye7rP7xGYowtuhTFYrA6UKkpVe56EqM/s1080/FB_IMG_1622130499106.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwz2Gk3nODWdrSlYxaXRaAIZX5at52Q_Aw12xo7cxqh1Q8JuOXn4TGDjQ0hVfmwajufV6YnqDl84cnfUErO5ae5KcAcYQ5OTSG-uh2gh-GPEC7Ye7rP7xGYowtuhTFYrA6UKkpVe56EqM/s320/FB_IMG_1622130499106.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div><br /><div><br /></div><div><br /></div></div>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-48649221459509921432010-11-11T08:32:00.089-05:002014-03-09T21:25:37.810-05:00AN OPINE ABOUT THE DETROIT LIONS<strong>The lion is the monarch of the jungle. <br />It is time for the Detroit Lions to purge and resurge!</strong><br />
<em>In 2008, Hooters celebrated their 25th anniversary while the Detroit Lions celebrated their 75th. These pictures show some of the women of Hooters as they champion support for the Detroit Lions as they prepare to improve.</em><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3Ya0pwF0t1vjnpg4OPu74DPPZBcy09YYqfXIB1rcPKMZxww0T9WpsS_Z_0TLLinFcow7GQ5jYwMb7B51arF7rU25lAVPr3jADrEqq6AWGkgeaBZjVXtLjwPfCua1GT3R8P4B74uXl3k4/s1600/HOOTERS1.JPG"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3Ya0pwF0t1vjnpg4OPu74DPPZBcy09YYqfXIB1rcPKMZxww0T9WpsS_Z_0TLLinFcow7GQ5jYwMb7B51arF7rU25lAVPr3jADrEqq6AWGkgeaBZjVXtLjwPfCua1GT3R8P4B74uXl3k4/s200/HOOTERS1.JPG" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5544852312922239554" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikGHw5bHF5B5o4eUur4O27MipwxjsZhYOXKIGAHno0nHm2Na3CseVL-LNTf2u7rNwbTwzWV60LAT5zPMwU1Bcq6jk6vdYXBuMP7XMWXEjlZN56BG_Bv1Bd8hWEBvtRy2-w6IeMrXKvUoc/s1600/charlies+angels+2.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikGHw5bHF5B5o4eUur4O27MipwxjsZhYOXKIGAHno0nHm2Na3CseVL-LNTf2u7rNwbTwzWV60LAT5zPMwU1Bcq6jk6vdYXBuMP7XMWXEjlZN56BG_Bv1Bd8hWEBvtRy2-w6IeMrXKvUoc/s200/charlies+angels+2.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538305024682296642" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a> <strong>An open letter to Lion's owner, William Clay Ford, originally posted on My Fox 2 blogs on December 30th, 2008, after the Lions went 0-16 that year:</strong><br />
<br />
Dear Mr. Ford,<br />
I don't know if you're listening to what Detroit Lions fans are saying. You can hear it on sports radio and you can read it on the blogs. We are hurting because your $4.5million dollar baby purchased in 1964, is not worth its current value of $700 million dollars, based on the team's win-loss record to date. We, the fans, are in pain because your baby has just died as evidenced by the 0-16 season.<br />
<br />
Some call you an aristocrat, a person who separates themself from the common person. I see you more as a human being. I believe the team's win-loss record bothers you as much as it bothers the typical fan. <br />
<br />
Some say you may want to win, but don't need to win, based on being an aristocrat. Again, the human part of you must feel the pain the typical fan feels, most recently exacerbated by the 0-16 2008 season.<br />
<br />
I think you have at least two choices as owner of the team, given the multiple decades of painful results the organization has produced on the grid iron:<br />
<br />
•Anesthetize yourself from the pain so you don't have to deal with it. <br />
•Lean into the pain to go past your comfort zone to make some positive decisions that will help to produce some positive results on the field. <br />
<br />
Lions fans are rooting for you to resuscitate the Detroit Lions, your baby. I'm trusting you will show us your humanity by dealing with the pain rather than ignoring it.<br />
<br />
You can start by talking about it with the fans so we can do this together. Nobody needs to experience that kind of pain alone.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTqDxbiz6mjtqhvmbZpSUPNjJBasKeUQYsNHw0qNb_kK57NGKehCB1e8xzLVk76YyvrsIDJ4e0ODbf_g2a_agb1aZWwczwzUy5TV-CprneY8igL1SaA5dTdhyphenhyphenf6FZ4keTivXcwTfmgj6c/s1600/purge+resurge+arizona+nisa.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTqDxbiz6mjtqhvmbZpSUPNjJBasKeUQYsNHw0qNb_kK57NGKehCB1e8xzLVk76YyvrsIDJ4e0ODbf_g2a_agb1aZWwczwzUy5TV-CprneY8igL1SaA5dTdhyphenhyphenf6FZ4keTivXcwTfmgj6c/s400/purge+resurge+arizona+nisa.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538340748127547122" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 300px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><br />
The idea behind the banner is to encourage the Lions to free themselves from whatever has not been working since 1957, when they had their last championship year, so they can resurge to once again win like champions.<br />
<br />
In 2008, I recommended something simple: Replace their logo, "Bubbles", with something more aggressive like the one they used during the 1950's. In 2009, the team modified "Bubbles" to make it look more lean and mean. <br />
<br />
On the other hand, the purging may be as complex as beating the curse of Bobby Layne, or Barry Sanders, much like the Boston Red Sox beat the 86 year old curse of the Bambino to win the world series in 2004. <br />
<br />
The solution to the woes of the Lions might even be found somewhere else on the continuum between the simple and complex.<br />
<br />
<em>If the Detroit Lions were on trial for being an NFL team-of-contention, when will there be enough evidence to convict them?</em><br />
<br />
Lions players, Lions management and Lions fans will know when the purging and resurging process is beginning:<br />
<br />
•When the team adds up more wins than losses. <br />
•When the players are asking more questions than they are answering.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWn9fREtcCevsjxLoyquXKHextR2Fzw_lzCTDTFR4gflS8D6qShm8QHt7ISS42Vdqzq6O1rs5ZWO4m7zoNXrwhmJSRGgJd5cFsVT70ZYuMDw-qR5oR0dDYC3gdQXs9x4bnFkx6gBDir5w/s1600/go+lions%2521.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWn9fREtcCevsjxLoyquXKHextR2Fzw_lzCTDTFR4gflS8D6qShm8QHt7ISS42Vdqzq6O1rs5ZWO4m7zoNXrwhmJSRGgJd5cFsVT70ZYuMDw-qR5oR0dDYC3gdQXs9x4bnFkx6gBDir5w/s200/go+lions%2521.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538336690777290386" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhraa16jxR9RNWD8tkB-U7ps33CBQc_C07KAQRAvam_kw_GipenLjadxZjUYtdGNufTkYWGuBcL7y0V4V8tcKRrD06jrz43jmbq33ThePLJhpCbHMS8dhMKuwnsYNmbzybB002rmHVdKbs/s1600/charlies+angels+1.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhraa16jxR9RNWD8tkB-U7ps33CBQc_C07KAQRAvam_kw_GipenLjadxZjUYtdGNufTkYWGuBcL7y0V4V8tcKRrD06jrz43jmbq33ThePLJhpCbHMS8dhMKuwnsYNmbzybB002rmHVdKbs/s200/charlies+angels+1.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538336476058932034" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a><br />
<br />
<strong>Professional Opine:</strong><br />
Jimmy Johnson, of Fox NFL Sunday, is so optimistic, one must question his credentials as a broadcaster. Aren't sportscasters supposed to be "critical" so that they can be viewed as "objective"? <br />
<br />
Given Jimmy's "hopeful" comment about the Lions during the 3rd game of the 2008 season, when the Lions lost to the 49'ers, 31-13, coupled with my pattern of finding something positive to say about the Lions, I felt compelled to bring in some reinforcements. This time, it's Jimmy Johnson.<br />
<br />
Why would Jimmy Johnson make an attempt to be empathic with Lions fans, who kept waiting for the 2008 season to do a 180 degree turn rather than just be "good-time Charlie" fans? <br />
<br />
All I know, when Jimmy Johnson said the Detroit Lions are "playing possum", it had Terry Bradshaw rolling his eyes during their half-time show. Of course, we already know what Terry Bradshaw thinks about Detroit.<br />
<br />
"Playing possum" (taken from Wikipedia) :<br />
<br />
"Playing possum" is a phrase which literally means "to pretend to be dead".<br />
<br />
It comes from a characteristic of the Virginia opossum, which is famous for pretending to be dead when threatened. This instinct doesn't always pay off in the modern world. For example, opossums scavenging roadkill may use its instinct in response to the threat posed by oncoming traffic, and subsequently end up as roadkill themselves.<br />
<br />
"Playing possum" can also mean simply pretending to be injured, unconscious, or otherwise vulnerable, often to lure an opponent into a vulnerable position himself.<br />
<br />
Mr. Ford, please do something different with the Lions organization if you don't want the possum to end up as road kill. Show Lions fans that the team is not really dead, and that it's just pretending. <br />
<br />
It's your move Mr. Ford. Don't be the driver who runs over your own scavenging possum that's pretending to be dead, when it's really alive.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx60VZNbOzapAvbB6HYTYthvhRrzkk2s9Z2Whl9KyBkYDdlAx_TIz05h7Unn922AAywNoM5vCF-N1oHBLcdjsZQbkQy7iaORsbHhlW5re6hhIOOgCoDf_eol_TX-Lc0-ayfsT_Ok-wwls/s1600/arizonas+heisman.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx60VZNbOzapAvbB6HYTYthvhRrzkk2s9Z2Whl9KyBkYDdlAx_TIz05h7Unn922AAywNoM5vCF-N1oHBLcdjsZQbkQy7iaORsbHhlW5re6hhIOOgCoDf_eol_TX-Lc0-ayfsT_Ok-wwls/s200/arizonas+heisman.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538305881709661154" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAPbUD5oMjLy0Jhi1aJaygp8snjlZa29D7_03d_RJ3tE2fHU-QxHt2H4E9snBRK-Clwu6R_Y0FWqUDb5g4g8kc1mvxLoD7DiC-fakQKmgU3q44qWkfss4Xnh92Tu1NP0sgD8P07LITQ6U/s1600/nisa%2527s+heisman.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAPbUD5oMjLy0Jhi1aJaygp8snjlZa29D7_03d_RJ3tE2fHU-QxHt2H4E9snBRK-Clwu6R_Y0FWqUDb5g4g8kc1mvxLoD7DiC-fakQKmgU3q44qWkfss4Xnh92Tu1NP0sgD8P07LITQ6U/s200/nisa%2527s+heisman.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538305679523942290" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a> <br />
<br />
<strong>Religion And Sports:</strong><br />
When people talk about religion or politics, the conversation can get very heated because both subjects evoke very personal thoughts and feelings. What happens when a conversation combines religion and sports? <br />
<br />
We all have a cross to bear. The cross is a symbol for something that can weigh us down. The weight of a cross can be the burden that immobilizes us so we cannot move forward. What cross does the Detroit Lions bear? How can the Detroit Lions embrace their cross so they can move forward?<br />
<br />
Are the Detroit Lions a confused team? The team usually plays hard each week, but moral victories do not add up in the win column. This, I believe, is their cross to bear. This can confuse even the smartest squirrel trying to cross the road as it goes back and forth, working hard to make its destination. Sometimes the squirrel makes it; other times, it doesn't make it. Take heart. Confusion is the first step to wisdom.<br />
<br />
I challenge the Detroit Lions to use their confusion (cross to bear) as something positive. Embrace the confusion and learn from it. <br />
<br />
When someone is confused, the best case scenario is to start asking questions to get some answers on how to improve. Ask questions, get feedback and wise up!<br />
<br />
Personally, I am embracing the Detroit Lions as my cross to bear. I have one request, though: Can my cross be made of balsa wood? I'm going to pray about it.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr_nFtaSkxsK81KhHFSOphJ0VriRMtSgxejtiQNrKHBGpOjL1LPzvuBKBfrUPNeljTDT336mnH37afglTNO9GdV-MfCG2Q9gZbtQTr7wVFt_GxcnvvCYPwsggzp9OHEzfQuERYKjd0IFA/s1600/JB+08%2526+hooters%2526Calvin+Johnson+025.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr_nFtaSkxsK81KhHFSOphJ0VriRMtSgxejtiQNrKHBGpOjL1LPzvuBKBfrUPNeljTDT336mnH37afglTNO9GdV-MfCG2Q9gZbtQTr7wVFt_GxcnvvCYPwsggzp9OHEzfQuERYKjd0IFA/s200/JB+08%2526+hooters%2526Calvin+Johnson+025.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538358147132437234" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirb6CeUfw9lQ89wgGykDp-Pfbxsm4T5nlA_2YApjRjx0rJXDr7TJYa1D5WMBK9dcOaWL05Z2VSvb6Ze-YWzKMEfQINGxrnemN0dv_bosaQZDhgqCFyK_6A70snGtrYGq6BT-AENsnfJDo/s1600/JB+08%2526+hooters%2526Calvin+Johnson+001.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirb6CeUfw9lQ89wgGykDp-Pfbxsm4T5nlA_2YApjRjx0rJXDr7TJYa1D5WMBK9dcOaWL05Z2VSvb6Ze-YWzKMEfQINGxrnemN0dv_bosaQZDhgqCFyK_6A70snGtrYGq6BT-AENsnfJDo/s200/JB+08%2526+hooters%2526Calvin+Johnson+001.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538358773436580338" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 150px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a>________________________________Megatron and Lois_____<br />
<br />
<strong>Quotable Quotes:</strong><br />
Winston Churchill said, <br />
<br />
"Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm". <br />
<br />
Lets remember the words of Henry Ford:<br />
<br />
"Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success".<br />
<br />
Kermit the frog once said, "It's not easy being green". People who believe the Lions are a different team each year, including me, have been saying, "It's not easy being optimistic".<br />
<br />
My words of encouragement to the Detroit Lions: <br />
<br />
It isn't the mountains ahead of you that will wear you guys out. It's the grain of sand in your shoes that will. Check your shoes before each game. <br />
<br />
The Lions have lost their teeth, and their roar sounds more like that of a kitten's purr, based on their win-loss record since 1957. <br />
<br />
For example:<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDjsmoRN3N4Az_6RkBccP8IW3CUTnxIIn-g_bSzYJuGrKpzsr-LTlr2ZiNk6WSfR46A7QhSg-AMq_xErjVKpnTRXtBtwleEJmubd0HXH44DYDCIAfbnOg3XB5aGeT0RzmffP2mgv0bvK8/s1600/toothless+lions.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDjsmoRN3N4Az_6RkBccP8IW3CUTnxIIn-g_bSzYJuGrKpzsr-LTlr2ZiNk6WSfR46A7QhSg-AMq_xErjVKpnTRXtBtwleEJmubd0HXH44DYDCIAfbnOg3XB5aGeT0RzmffP2mgv0bvK8/s200/toothless+lions.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538322053100506578" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 96px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 200px;" /></a>I feel bad for the guys who get seriously injured during the season because the team record does nothing to offer them any relief.<br />
<br />
Detroit fans mostly come from a blue-collar, hard working town. We work hard so we can expect positive results from the fruits of our labor. So it is with our sports teams. When there's anything less than a winning season, because that's what matters at the professional level, something different needs to happen. <br />
<br />
Some people want Mr. Ford to sell the team to increase their chances of becoming Super Bowl contenders. If those people were correct, I would agree with them. I've heard that argument before with the Detroit Tigers. I remember fans calling for the jobs of Mr. Ilitch (owner) and Mr. Dombrowski (general manager) prior to the Tigers playing in the World Series in 2006. Neither gentleman is gone, yet the Tigers were a team of contention for at least two years (2006-2008) under their watch.<br />
<br />
<strong>Prepare to win, Detroit Lions. Prepare to smile, Lions fans!</strong><br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilF4-BeSNiVRM2yxoxbiXA9EkJlJSZc5br0-47ubDQkp2nfNrXtv5fB09Rfk4LJcHAposw6HR4xhDG_BhFit-Up5IUghvsiXDI3_GkaNDksPzmTpC1Dd2LJ9Ra2Io1eZcI-LsRK08ybrQ/s1600/kittentolion.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilF4-BeSNiVRM2yxoxbiXA9EkJlJSZc5br0-47ubDQkp2nfNrXtv5fB09Rfk4LJcHAposw6HR4xhDG_BhFit-Up5IUghvsiXDI3_GkaNDksPzmTpC1Dd2LJ9Ra2Io1eZcI-LsRK08ybrQ/s200/kittentolion.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5559816768750256706" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 200px; margin: 0 0 10px 10px; width: 200px;" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjymtDTkkLjK_3X7JrWJiGVFQ3app1-Ftxky0Bjk-yTCqHP2tbsBVRZ0P9u3-VJ3QMkwsJMGC8ML2EAb9QqO6ijI2Y19CoCVFE_oWL1f-z6SDHcW_LJcuPURAEOrqVtlz9NCdXYngHAQEk/s1600/perfect+pre-season+lions.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjymtDTkkLjK_3X7JrWJiGVFQ3app1-Ftxky0Bjk-yTCqHP2tbsBVRZ0P9u3-VJ3QMkwsJMGC8ML2EAb9QqO6ijI2Y19CoCVFE_oWL1f-z6SDHcW_LJcuPURAEOrqVtlz9NCdXYngHAQEk/s200/perfect+pre-season+lions.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5559816772497925250" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 106px; margin: 0 0 10px 10px; width: 130px;" /></a><br />
Written by,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(11/10)
<b>Post script dated March 9th, 2014: My condolences to the Ford family who lost William Clay Ford, Sr. today due to complications related to pneumonia. He was 88 years old. It is sad to know that Mr. Ford's team did everything they could to win a championship for him while he was alive, but always fell short of their goal. May you rest in peace, Mr. Ford.</b>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-50335356755605160562010-10-29T05:32:00.062-05:002014-11-08T15:04:52.447-05:00HUMILITY -vs- EXALTATION<span style="color: #990000;"><em><strong>Country singer, Mac Davis, sings, "Oh, Lord, it's hard to be humble, when you're perfect in every way".</strong></em></span><br />
<strong></strong><br />
<strong>Can the illusion of "perfection", or the exaltation of oneself, lead to being humbled? Consider this joke:</strong><br />
<br />
NFL quarterbacks, Brett Favre, Eli Manning and Tom Brady died and went to heaven. They are greeted by God at the Pearly Gates. God said to all three, "Before you enter heaven, please tell Me what you did on earth to deserve being up here".<br />
<br />
Brett Favre answered, "I promoted team work and worked hard to set a good example for others". God replied, "Nice job, Brett. Please enter the gates, and you can sit on My right side".<br />
<br />
Eli Manning responded, "I did those things, too, and I looked out after the children". "Very nice, Eli", said God. "You can come in and sit on My left side".<br />
<br />
PAUSE.<br />
<br />
God interupted the pause and said, "Well, Tom. I'm waiting. What have you done on earth to deserve being up here in heaven"? Tom Brady answered, "Excuse me, God. You're sitting in my chair".<br />
<br />
<strong>On the other hand, can humility, or the humbling of oneself, lead to being exalted? Consider the following story:</strong><br />
<br />
There are four bakeries located on the same street, in the same town. Each of them works hard to sell more doughnuts than the others.<br />
<br />
Bakery #1 advertises by saying, "We sell the best doughnuts in the <em>country</em>"!<br />
<br />
Bakery #2 wants to compete, so they advertise by saying, "We sell the best doughnuts in the <em>world</em>"!<br />
<br />
Not to be outdone by the first two bakeries, bakery #3 advertises by saying, "We sell the best doughnuts in the <em>universe</em>"!<br />
<br />
Then there is bakery #4. It's a mom and pop bakery. Their strategy to sell more doughnuts is by saying, "We sell the best doughnuts on <em>this street</em>"!<br />
<br />
The moral of the story: Keep it simple, and be humble to be effective!<br />
<br />
<span style="color: #3333ff;"><strong><span style="color: #990000;">The joke and the story reveal two interesting lessons:</span></strong></span><br />
<span style="color: #ffffcc;"><span style="color: #3333ff;"><strong><span style="color: #990000;">1. Some people like to wear the mask of "perfection".</span> </strong></span></span><br />
<strong><span style="color: #990000;">2. Other people go through life wearing no mask.</span></strong><br />
<br />
What is the difference between someone who believes they are perfect and someone who believes they are imperfect? The perfect person has the attitude, "I'm not like other people". While that may be true when we're talking about likes, dislikes, personalities, values, skills, experiences, etc., it isn't true when we're talking about our humanity, the common ground for human-beings. Imperfection is one characteristic of the basis of our humanity. It is not to say that our humanity acts as an excuse for our imperfections. Rather, it is the common realization all human beings have strengths and growth areas because nobody is perfect.<br />
<br />
Imperfect people keep it simple by being genuine, respectful, dignified and truthful in their relations with self and others. There is no need to wear a mask. The down-to-earth, mom and pop bakery that decided not to wear a mask when marketing their goods probably sold more doughnuts because truth-in-advertising works. So-called "perfect" people wear a mask that hides one's true <em>human</em> identity.<br />
<br />
To learn humility, it is important to be genuine and honest in order to face the truth about oneself; the good, the bad and the ugly so-to-speak. Self-revelation [by way of counseling and/or prayer] helps teach self-acceptance, self-respect and dignity. Self-revelation happens when a person can look into a mirror and see someone looking back who is not wearing a mask. It is humbling because the reflection would be an honest depiction of the person's humanity. From that starting point, a personal decision is made. Do I need to wear a mask or not? If I choose not to wear one, I can begin to see other people not wearing one, too. The person sees themself, and others, as human-beings. <br />
<br />
<em><strong>It is an honest, simple and humbling revelation, devoid of any exaltation that underscores our common ground: There is one race, the human race. </strong></em> <br />
<br />
For people who wrestle with their humanity, think of the eloquent words by Canadian songwriter, musician, poet and novelist, Leonard Cohen, who said, "There is a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in".<br />
<br />
<em>Thank you, Father Doug Bignall, for your inspirational sermons, which helped me to write this article for Stooltime Counseling!</em><br />
<br />
Written by,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(10/10)<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj07g7Phnum_QofouTXikI05jm3O0OJZ_SeodjssA6HjystMaK4EDwnubT9tQAkHFVvhGhHEVRP7GEDjlobOXtLttYE_eF8ttrm9c-_qPWIH7pXaO2gJKemyFW3RV4-74z_VPwvHTtOvKs/s1600/samantha2.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj07g7Phnum_QofouTXikI05jm3O0OJZ_SeodjssA6HjystMaK4EDwnubT9tQAkHFVvhGhHEVRP7GEDjlobOXtLttYE_eF8ttrm9c-_qPWIH7pXaO2gJKemyFW3RV4-74z_VPwvHTtOvKs/s200/samantha2.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5556098118632770866" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 150px; margin: 0px 0px 10px 10px; width: 200px;" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbfO1Dea6bRqKPxsMjDPlm_pgB_t9onhvOJ2s2Sn9drNVO3qsR98qXjACnsSi9Yh782CklBlOHIqm5cwH5QF1tV5SqyJq80yVrKQGmqe7LDwHWkT2FS5j_p6dX-uJAeI9AN7zi1pLeqCQ/s1600/samantha1.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbfO1Dea6bRqKPxsMjDPlm_pgB_t9onhvOJ2s2Sn9drNVO3qsR98qXjACnsSi9Yh782CklBlOHIqm5cwH5QF1tV5SqyJq80yVrKQGmqe7LDwHWkT2FS5j_p6dX-uJAeI9AN7zi1pLeqCQ/s200/samantha1.jpg" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5556098113597033234" style="cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 150px; margin: 0px 0px 10px 10px; width: 200px;" /></a><br />
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<strong> Thanks for supporting Stooltime Counseling, Samantha!</strong><br />
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<strong>Stooltime Counseling supports small business owners like Potato Joe, whose vegetable and fruit stand is located in Anchorville, MI. Likewise, Potato Joe supports Stooltime Counseling. Thanks, Joe!</strong><br />
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<strong></strong><br />Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-71388088927742410972010-07-11T16:13:00.025-05:002015-08-26T13:54:12.225-05:00THE STIGMA OF ADULTERYMichigan Adultery Law, excerpt from penal code, Act 328 of 1931<br />
Chapter V<br />
<strong>ADULTERY</strong><br />
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750.29 Adultery; definition. Sec. 29.<br />
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Definition - Adultery is the sexual intercourse of 2 persons, either of whom is married to a third person.<br />
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750.30 Adultery; punishment. Sec. 30.<br />
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Punishment - Any person who shall commit adultery shall be guilty of a felony; and when the crime is committed between a married woman and a man who is unmarried, the man shall be guilty of adultery, and liable to the same punishment.<br />
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750.31 Adultery; complaint and time of prosecution. Sec. 31.<br />
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Complainant and time of prosecution to be commenced - No prosecution for adultery, under the preceding section, shall be commenced, but on the complaint of the husband or wife; and no such prosecution shall be commenced after 1 year from the time of committing the offense.<br />
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750.32 Adultery; cohabitation of divorced parties. Sec. 32.<br />
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Cohabitation by divorced parties - If any persons after being divorced from the bonds of matrimony for any cause whatever, shall cohabit together, they shall be liable to all the penalties provided by law against adultery.<br />
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<em>The above information is NOT legal advice, nor does it constitute a legal opinion.</em><br />
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Here's my opinion:<br />
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<strong>Premise: It is society, at any given time, that determines stigma, law and enforcement of the law.</strong><br />
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The stigma of adultery in the early 21st century is a lot like the stigma of drunk driving before the inception of Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD). There is very little stigma attached to it.<br />
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Before MADD insisted on stronger penalties for drunk driving, circa 1970's, drunk drivers who got caught either got a slap on the wrist from the court, or the police did not bother to arrest you (verbal warning only). Before the late 1970's, it was common for police to pull you over if you showed signs of drunk driving; however, the consequences that followed were different from what happens today. Before MADD, a drunk driving stop by the police could've resulted in the police pouring out any unfinished adult beverage onto the pavement and sending you home. If a drunk driver did appear in court, the lawyer would ask for a jury trial because ten out of twelve jury members probably drink and drive, too. The legal defense back then was to elicit sympathy and empathy from the jury. <br />
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Fast forward to the early 21st century. No more legal breaks are given if you're busted for drinking and driving. Prosecution is pretty much guaranteed. This is because of the social stigma attached to that kind of behavior. It took MADD to enlighten society, strengthen enforcement efforts by the police and encourage the courts to prosecute. Unfortunately, despite the stigma and consequences, some people still drink and drive. The question can be asked, "Are fewer people choosing to drink and drive now than before"? I believe, yes.<br />
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The parallel between the drunk driving stigma and adultery stigma goes like this: I believe the adultery stigma in the early 21st century is similar to the drunk driving stigma before MADD started doing their thing a few decades ago. <br />
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Is the law against adultery not enforced because the act is so common? It is estimated that 60% of married men, and 40% of married women commit adultery. Would ten out of twelve jurors have sympathy and empathy for an adulterer? Even if adultery is common, does it make it any less serious?<br />
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Some people call adultery a sin. It is certainly a betrayal of trust between spouses. Psychologically, the underlying motivation to commit adultery is to seek a thrill. Seeking a thrill can get a person in trouble if the behavior is illegal or immoral; and that's why it's a thrill. Nobody intends to get caught. I submit there are legal and moral ways to seek a thrill.<br />
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It will be interesting to see how long it takes for the act of adultery to become more of a social stigma again. It took MADD and the courts to eventually stigmatize and prosecute drunk drivers. Besides the church, who will step-up on this one?<br />
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All human-beings figureatively live in glass houses. Throwing stones is not a good idea, lest we get them thrown back at us. Nobody is perfect. However, all the free will in the world to make decisions that will affect personal lives is meaningless unless it is underscored with the concept of responsibleness. The person who responsibly rejects the option to commit adultery might be metaphorically thinking, "Why would I want to go out and have hamburger when I can stay home and have steak?" <br />
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What am I thinking, feeling and doing today that shows others and myself that I am a responsible person?<br />
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Written by,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor.<br />
(7/10).<br />
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<b>Thanks for supporting Stooltime Counseling, Balue and Sukie!</b>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-81166386095825247352010-06-25T10:34:00.022-05:002016-05-30T22:07:32.759-05:00FREEDOM AND RESPONSIBILITY: AN OASIS AND A DESERTI describe freedom as an oasis of excitement, and responsibility as a desert of boredom. To be free is very exciting. To be responsible can be very boring. Freedom is fun, responsibility is hard work. Can one exist without the other or are the two interdependent?<br />
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I believe society is beginning to grapple with that question as evidenced by radio and television talk show hosts like Bill O'Reilly making references about people behaving responsibly or not. I once counted Bill O'Reilly using the word, "responsible", or a synonym for the word, 10 times during one of his shows. Bill O'Reilly, and others, take a chance talking about responsibility and accountability because some people meander about in our no-fault society and don't buy into its value. It is my contention that more people need to get involved in the discussion about freedom and responsibility. An expanded national dialogue needs to happen. Where's the media when you need them to support my contention?<br />
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It has been a joy and a frustration to belong on two committees (Human Development and Public Relations) with the Statue Of Responsibility Foundation. The Foundation wants to organize people to privately fund the building of a new national monument that could expand the national dialogue on the theme of people thinking, feeling and acting responsibly. Does this already sound boring? It's no wonder why most of the media dismisses the need to cover the story.<br />
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The joy for me is doing something for which I feel passionate. I have the opportunity to meet a lot of influential people during my tenure with the Foundation. I am also grateful for being a part of an organized, grass roots effort that is building a new national monument that will supplement the Statue Of Liberty. What an impact it will have on America and the world! With freedom comes responsibility. With excitement comes the boredom. It almost sounds like a yin-yang kind of thing.<br />
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I also feel the joy to know there are plans by the Foundation to provide scholarships to kids after the monument, which will bookend the Statue Of Liberty, is built. Who couldn't use some financial support to pay for college?<br />
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The frustration for me is working to contact influential media sources, and not hearing back from most of them. Is "responsibility" too boring of a concept to be covered by the media? The media likes to project excitement and sensationalism. I suppose it will take a celebrity or other famous person to be named as the Foundation's national spokesperson before the Foundation's efforts to build the monument catches the attention of most of the media. Certainly, the book, "Responsibility 911" is on sale now, and being used to generate money that will be used to help build the monument. See the Foundation's website <a href="http://statueofresponsibility.com/">The Statue Of Responsibility</a> for details.<br />
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Here is a list of people/media I have contacted since joining the Foundation in August, 2005. Some were kind enough to respond, others were not. <br />
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<strong>President George W. Bush</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Maria Shriver</strong>, California first lady.<br />
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<strong>Bill Gates</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Rush Limbaugh</strong>.<br />
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<strong>David Limbaugh</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Sean Hannity</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Glenn Beck</strong>. (Invited to be a Goodwill Ambassador with the Foundation)<br />
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<strong>Neal Boortz</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Bill O'Reilly</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Michelle Malkin</strong> - Fox News Channel and blogger.<br />
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<strong>Professor Rothman</strong> - UNLV History Department.<br />
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<strong>Vince Swift</strong> - The Statue Of Liberty Club.<br />
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<strong>Oakland University Alumni Magazine</strong>, Michigan.<br />
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<strong>The Detroit Tigers</strong> Organization.<br />
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<strong>The Detroit Lions</strong> Organization.<br />
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<strong>Al Johnson</strong> - Fox 2 Detroit.<br />
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<strong>The Bay Voice Newspaper</strong>, Michigan.<br />
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<strong>The Macomb Daily Newspaper</strong>, Michigan.<br />
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<strong>Mort Crim Communications</strong>, Southfield, Michigan.<br />
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<strong>Comcast Newsmakers</strong>.<br />
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<strong>The Times Herald Newspaper</strong>, Port Huron, Michigan.<br />
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<strong>Senator Debbie Stabenow</strong>, Michigan.<br />
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<strong>Congresswoman Candice Miller</strong>, Michigan.<br />
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<strong>Representative Dan Acciavatti</strong>, Michigan.<br />
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<strong>Tim Allen</strong>. (Invited to be a Goodwill Ambassador with the Foundation)<br />
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<strong>Jay Leno</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Oprah Winfrey</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Retired Admiral Herbert Meyer</strong>. (Invited to be a Goodwill Ambassador with the Foundation)<br />
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<strong>Paul W. Smith</strong>, WJR 760 AM radio, Detroit.<br />
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<strong>Roger Goodell</strong>, NFL Commissioner.<br />
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<strong>Allan H. (Bud) Selig</strong>, MLB Commissioner.<br />
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<strong>David Stern</strong>, NBA Commissioner.<br />
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<strong>Gary Bettman</strong>, NHL Commissioner.<br />
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<strong>The Heritage Foundation</strong>.<br />
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<strong>The Drudge Report</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Senator John McCain</strong>.<br />
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<strong>Sarah Palin</strong>, Alaska Governor.<br />
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<strong>Anheuser-Busch, Inc., </strong>"Responsibility Matters" program.<br />
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<strong>Lets get the monument built!</strong><br />
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Written by,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(6/10).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwy-yEZpM18jfQGF9FAOzHCMHGHbcDRwRU7suGzeVcY0pdytg4_mKWz1YmHn2zM-VGFGeDJmVOoslmPqsCUMrKXAvFzk0IeAGrnRY9suIGot1pmt3DXtYDwrTTn0AWGaX7_5Bixz5iI5s/s1600/Rocky.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5639408267480083842" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwy-yEZpM18jfQGF9FAOzHCMHGHbcDRwRU7suGzeVcY0pdytg4_mKWz1YmHn2zM-VGFGeDJmVOoslmPqsCUMrKXAvFzk0IeAGrnRY9suIGot1pmt3DXtYDwrTTn0AWGaX7_5Bixz5iI5s/s320/Rocky.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 318px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a><strong>The Great Pyrenees, Rocky, stands guard against predation while supporting Stooltime Counseling. Thank you, Rocky!</strong>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-36862393091947804922010-06-25T09:15:00.012-05:002010-08-18T22:40:47.674-05:00INCREASED SAFETY AND SECURITYTo be a victim of a crime is a painful experience, whether it be a crime against property or person. The personal violation often prompts feelings of anger. The purpose of this article is to help readers decrease their chances of becoming a victim. There are never any guarantees in life, so the information can only be used as guidelines to increase one's safety and security in a world where the criminal element (enemy) has the desire (hurt, steal, bully), opportunity (a car or purse to steal, a person to rob) and ability (overpower, surprise, intimidate, use of technology or weapons) to inflict harm on innocent, law-abiding citizens.<br /><br />What follows is some information I learned from two distinguished police officers during a work-site inservice. I want to thank the West Bloomfield police department for having two of their finest men present the information at an inservice entitled, "Service Provider Safety And Security". Thank you, Officer Rick Trabulsy and Sgt. Tom Keilman. I appreciate both of you giving me your verbal permission to write this article for my website.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9OPNTqxOuG451ASxLvkvEKqtaC3o6mjNwoKrJ6MT0vpZda25IkTz5Lea9XEZvWNsop8DrUHqmrqXJ638so5hcOm1NbDqPRPafX6gMhe3UqPMei12-yENxwvzpR2LqRIZeg3xHibOsvhg/s1600/WBpolice1"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9OPNTqxOuG451ASxLvkvEKqtaC3o6mjNwoKrJ6MT0vpZda25IkTz5Lea9XEZvWNsop8DrUHqmrqXJ638so5hcOm1NbDqPRPafX6gMhe3UqPMei12-yENxwvzpR2LqRIZeg3xHibOsvhg/s400/WBpolice1" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5506955167245679490" /></a><strong>Thank you for supporting Stooltime Counseling, Officer Rick Trabulsy and Sgt. Tom Keilman! I am honored.</strong><br /><br /><em><strong>VICTIMIZATION OVERVIEW:</strong></em><br /><br />The offender has a plan. It includes the desire, opportunity and ability to commit a crime.<br /><br />The <em>desire</em> is connected to the criminal's observations of potential victims. No matter where we go, criminals are observing their potential victims. It could be at the grocery store, where 90% of the shoppers are female, who carry purses. It could be the garbage man or mail man, who can sell our personal information to criminals.<br /><br />The <em>opportunity</em> is related to the criminal making contact with the victim. Approach tactics are used to get close to an intended victim.<br /><br />The stranger approach happens in a moment. The victim does not know the criminal in this scenario. Purse snatchings, muggings or car jackings are some examples.<br /><br />The casual approach takes time to develop. This could be the "nice" man who meets an unsuspecting female victim on the internet, develops her trust by wining and dining her and then robs her blind by stealing her credit cards or something similar.<br /><br />The family approach is related to situations concerning domestic violence. Abuse or neglect of any kind underscores the family approach of the criminal.<br /><br />The <em>ability</em> to commit a crime is connected to the actual confrontation with the victim. To stop the criminal from getting to this part of their plan, a potential victim needs to eliminate the criminal's opportunity. Whoever has the best plan, wins.<br /><br /><strong>DEVELOPING A TACTICAL PRESENTATION:</strong><br /><br />The best defense is a good offense.<br /><br />Be aware of your surroundings.<br /><br />Dress to win.<br /><br />Implement assertive body language by walking with a purpose and making eye contact with strangers. For example, the incidence of shop lifting or retail fraud is greatly reduced when store employees make eye contact with customers as they enter the store. <br /><br />Think two or three steps ahead at all times so the criminal has less of an opportunity to use the element of surprise.<br /><br />Have an inventory of aggressive verbal responses if confronted by a criminal. Yell to draw attention. Use simple words like, "Stop", "Fire", "Get back", "No" or "911". Avoid using the word, "Rape", because bystanders could turn a deaf ear for fear of getting involved in something that doesn't concern them. <br /><br />Trust your intuition or 6th sense when out in public. A denial of potential danger is the greatest enemy of intuition. Be aware!<br /><br />Train to win or have a positive view of escaping potential danger. Have a plan and practice it. Visualize yourself winning against the criminal. Evaluate/adapt your plan as needed.<br /><br />Another key to safety is to take someone with you when going out in public like the shopping mall.<br /><br /><strong>ENEMIES OF THE CRIMINAL:</strong><br /><br /><em>Extended time:</em> A criminal wants to do a crime fast. Locking your doors (car, home) and having an alarm system extends the time needed to commit a crime. This doesn't mean the criminal stops being a criminal. Crime prevention is a fallacy. However, by extending the time needed to commit a crime, the crime is moved somewhere else because the criminal then looks for the opportunity to commit a crime elsewhere.<br /><br /><em>Light:</em> From dusk to dawn, have some kind of lighting turned-on in your home. Avoid walking in dark areas on the street.<br /><br /><em>Noise:</em> Alarms, horns, whistles, and yelling all draw attention to the criminal. Drawing attention is something the criminal does not want during the commission of a crime.<br /><br /><strong>DEFENSIVE TACTICS, STRATEGIES AND SKILLS:</strong><br /><br />The goal of a potential victim is to <strong>ESCAPE</strong> a dangerous situation.<br /><br />It is a personal choice to use a counter attack to defend yourself or not defend yourself, based on the circumstances. You must have confidence in yourself and your abilities if you choose the former.<br /><br />To repeat, the goal is to get away, to escape. If you choose to defend yourself, your counter attack must be quick and vicious.<br /><br /><strong>FACTORS TO CONSIDER IF YOU ARE ASSAULTED:</strong><br /><br />The assailant is probably stronger than you, and may have a weapon.<br /><br />The assailant has the advantage of surprise.<br /><br />The assailant has picked the time and location of the attack.<br /><br />The attacker will intimidate with threats of injury or other consequences.<br /><br />Your fear may paralyze your thinking and response.<br /><br />If your attacker is armed with a weapon <strong>DO NOT</strong> resist, but if it is your life, do what is necessary. <br /><br />If you are confronted by multiple assailants, resist only if absolutely necessary.<br /><br />If an attacker is after property, give it up! Resisting may make the encounter escalate. <br /><br />Avoid being taken to a second crime scene/location.<br /><br /><strong>ESCAPE CONSIDERATIONS AND TACTICS:</strong><br /><br />Run to safety, not away from danger.<br /><br />Do not hesitate when it comes to escaping.<br /><br />Get objects (like a car) or noise (blow a whistle, yelling, car horn) between you and the assailant. Do whatever is necessary to draw attention to yourself.<br /><br />Hide only if your general location is unknown, if there are numerous available options to go, or if help is not near.<br /><br />Keep thinking ahead. Re-evaluate your plan as needed.<br /><br />Your best weapons are your awareness and a good tactical presentation.<br /><br /><strong>Learning self-defense skills:</strong><br /><br />If you are able to learn self-defense skills (martial arts, other training), by all means, get the training. Learning and practicing self-defense skills helps improve your confidence so you can develop a plan to help you escape from dangerous situations.<br /><br />Be safe!<br /><br />Written by,<br />Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />Licensed Professional Counselor<br />(6/10).Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-2691459885325096102010-06-25T07:33:00.021-05:002012-12-19T23:14:36.945-05:00UNDERSTANDING CRIMEIt's difficult to understand a problem when there are so many causes. Cancer is one such problem, but then so is crime. This doesn't mean we as a society should give-up or quit trying to understand crime and criminal behavior. Understanding a problem is one of the first steps to doing something about it. I am not a forensic expert, nor am I versed in the study of criminal justice. What I want to offer in this article is my opinion as an ordinary citizen, who is concerned about the perception that more and more of the world is becoming lawless and violent.<br />
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I read about violent crime in the newspaper, hear horrific stories on the radio and see disgusting examples of predatory human behavior gone awry on the television every day. It is pathetic how some people treat others. Murders, rapes, school shootings, domestic violence, and the list goes on. If it bleeds, it leads in the media. Sometimes I just scratch my head and ask myself, "Is human nature basically evil or is it something else"? ("Evil" means the absence of "good", just like "darkness" means the absence of "light"). I don't pretend to have the answers, but I do have some insights, based on what some of the experts have said and written. <br />
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<strong>What are some of the causes of crime?</strong> <br />
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<em>The absence of God in school?</em> If this were true, it could imply that non-believers are automatically lawless people. That would be ridiculous.<br />
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<em>Mental illness?</em> I believe that there are more mentally ill people who are victims of crime than who commit crimes. This is not a fair example of a scapegoat to explain the crime rate.<br />
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<em>Cities asking for federal funding?</em> Does the reported crime rate go up when a city needs more money to pay for police protection? How does this happen?<br />
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<em>The Great Society's war on poverty?</em> This one doesn't explain white collar crime or corruption in the political arena. Criminal behavior shows no preference to socio-economic status.<br />
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<em>The media's role?</em> Has the crime rate, per capita in society, always been the same, but because we live in the age of information, we know more about it than we did 100 years ago?<br />
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<em>Social engineers?</em> How important is it to instill fear in our youth so that they can learn to tell the difference between right and wrong? Social engineers say it is abusive to use corporal punishment in school and at home; that it teaches kids to be violent. Other people say sparing the rod spoils the child; some youngsters need to be applauded with just one hand. [Note: In 2010, there are 21 American states that allow some form of corporal punishment in the schools].<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1_wGFpnIbSrMOjxE5Z_x4I7Ig-ko3Fw0807QMaqExeePT_2hHOE3Q_rTpdiwLJ9Hz9IaG90YY80evpNkhCKAcIARTiIfqrRY_BQUMHVxgaHCLBAzffCnNL4ej0VVtA25vXiHUlVwPPZw/s1600/spanking.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5544855885379248482" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1_wGFpnIbSrMOjxE5Z_x4I7Ig-ko3Fw0807QMaqExeePT_2hHOE3Q_rTpdiwLJ9Hz9IaG90YY80evpNkhCKAcIARTiIfqrRY_BQUMHVxgaHCLBAzffCnNL4ej0VVtA25vXiHUlVwPPZw/s200/spanking.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 158px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 200px;" /></a><em>Parent's role?</em> Is it fair to blame the parents of kids who act out-of-control? How many kids join gangs because there is no positive validation and acknowledgement at home? I will say that parenting is a skill that does not require a license. <br />
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<em>Personality disorders?</em> One example is the anti-social personality. Anti-social types have no empathy for their fellow human-being. Some report an inability to feel any emotions. When asked, "Why did you commit that crime?", a typical response might be, "Because I can". Others might respond, "I'm addicted to chasing the rush it gives me". By itself, medication does not help improve the prognosis. Some recent studies, based on the brain scan results of psychopathic killers, suggest that Omega 3 nutrition started in early childhood, in addition to having specific environmental influences (being taught how to give and receive adaptive love), can lessen the chances of someone insidiously behaving in anti-social ways. It's called nourishing and teaching the frontal lobe cortex. Anything humane that can prevent, lessen or treat cognitive/affective/behavioral pathology has socially redeeming value. <br />
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<em>Illicit drugs?</em> Some people call illicit drug use a "victimless crime", and that if society legalized illicit drugs, the jails would have room to house the truly violent criminals. They might be the same people who have never gone face-to-face with a crack head, who would do anything to get another rock.<br />
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<em>Prescribed medications?</em> The mainstream medical community needs to be acutely aware of this one. Risks and benefits of all medications need to be explained to people before they are prescribed and dispensed. It is the responsibility of the doctor to monitor the effectiveness, or lack thereof, of any prescribed medication. It is the responsibility of the person receiving the medication to report any side effects to their doctor. The efficacy of any pharmaceutical drug prescribed to people who are susceptible to violence needs to be evaluated and understood. I mean now, not later.<br />
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<em>Access to guns or other weapons?</em> Having access to guns is protected by the United States Constitution, and is legal if the person has a permit or license to carry one, and has no history of a mental illness or felony record. Even though guns scare the crap out of me, I would feel safer in a room with someone who is law abiding, sober and packing heat than with someone who isn't a law abiding citizen.<br />
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<em>The economy?</em> Can the lack of available gainful employment cause even honest people to act dishonestly? Whose responsibility is it to have marketable skills in order to compete in the job market?<br />
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<em>Eating dinner with family?</em> With all the theories about crime, the one that has been consistent through time: The vast majority of people in prison never ate dinner as a family.<br />
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<em>One's thought process?</em> At the heart of all crime (bullying, robbing, killing, assaulting, political corruption, other), the perpetrator or assailant has the attitude, "I am better than you".<br />
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Written by,<br />
Mark Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(6/10)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgETbDhsuQdn26IKaarN6pUseP6LdK_J7cu7A82H9qPpY9YI_Rm7nWwAB7UpT8Ag1rAKMym9ly6ncPvNfqUtbzPPA3IF12kOcSdvcHI9_Ds1PF2Dpnhf-9-yIGTBHi34Fitsr9X7xfdHP4/s1600/Megan.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5623819409881399730" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgETbDhsuQdn26IKaarN6pUseP6LdK_J7cu7A82H9qPpY9YI_Rm7nWwAB7UpT8Ag1rAKMym9ly6ncPvNfqUtbzPPA3IF12kOcSdvcHI9_Ds1PF2Dpnhf-9-yIGTBHi34Fitsr9X7xfdHP4/s320/Megan.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-19878246214332286332007-02-26T11:50:00.003-05:002017-10-06T21:52:18.433-05:00HEROES AND HEROINES<strong>WHO IS YOUR HERO OR HEROINE?</strong> <br />
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A HERO is a man of exceptional quality who is admired for what he does. A female hero is called a HEROINE. Some typical examples include parents, athletes and teachers, but can be anybody whose perceived status is held in high regard by at least one person. People tend to emulate their heroes because there is a part of us who wants to be like the person we admire. Sometimes this becomes a problem when we diminish our own value as a human being at the expense of imitating someone else. There's a difference between looking for that hero from within and without.<br />
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Take for example butt cleavage. You ask, what's the connection between the visible split down one's backside and heroes or heroines? The fashion trend started somewhere by somebody. Young people looked from without and found role-models for butt cleavage. This is not a joke about plumbers. Word on the street has it that the fashion statement of wearing one's pants half way down one's hips started as one way to emulate prisoners in jail. Prisoners are not allowed to wear a belt on their pants, and so the pants tend to slide down a little. The look is strictly for young people because the older we get, the higher the waistline becomes. Even though parts of our society detest criminal behavior, other parts seem to be emulating it by dressing in like-fashion. <br />
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When we look for the hero or heroine from within, we value who we are and can confidently define our self-concept. We have learned to be comfortable with how we are different and unique from others. <br />
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To look for the hero or heroine from without means we are still comparing ourselves to others because we may not have a clear definition of our self-concept.<br />
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<strong>There are three parts to the self-concept:</strong> <br />
<em>I see myself as ... <br />Others see me as ... <br />Ideally, I see myself as ...</em><br />
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Most people would say that it's okay to look-up to others whom we respect and admire. For example, it's natural to figureatively put our heroes and heroines on a pedestal. <br />
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If we value how our parents raised us, our dad may be our hero, and our mom is our heroine. A talented athlete who has served the community well may also get placed on that figureative pedestal in the eyes of many fans. I want to remember the teachers who do an exceptional job in helping to create a new generation of outstanding students and citizens. They are definitely heroes and heroines. As for the butt cleavage, when a young person decides he/she no longer wants to "stick it to the man" (welcome to mainstream society because most people out-grow the rebellious, anti-authority stage when they become parents), the pants will find the true waistline.<br />
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With all of that said, each of us starts somewhere when we decide to pick our heroes and heroines. The journey usually begins at home with ourself. If we see our heroes and heroines as hard-working, high-achieving, responsible people, we are really describing ourselves. It is human nature to project ourself onto others. When we can own the traits and characteristics we ascribe to our heroes and heroines, we learn that each of us is our own best hero or heroine. <br />
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Who is your hero or heroine? When you know who it is, in a sense, you are seeing yourself, butt cleavage or not! <br />
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Written by,<br />
Mark S. Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(7/06)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoi5s8bF_rI06XNiwmaXaNOcBrMhdnyFHEEzxkpm6ElV57-k5T8Hc1FNUimJ00hD4_PSCivuAwouCs3QWVtBjHf_YtEwwlSHrK7Llii4ZKv1YJ7KQShC8jq0H1XibpmFdSVWm7xEktmRc/s1600/hooters+david+011.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5474349134258122658" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoi5s8bF_rI06XNiwmaXaNOcBrMhdnyFHEEzxkpm6ElV57-k5T8Hc1FNUimJ00hD4_PSCivuAwouCs3QWVtBjHf_YtEwwlSHrK7Llii4ZKv1YJ7KQShC8jq0H1XibpmFdSVWm7xEktmRc/s400/hooters+david+011.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 300px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a> <strong>Thanks for supporting Stooltime Counseling, Danielle!</strong><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu9_VuYE-xtWq9yfTr37yIKN0WmH97l2Vc7NAE3E65tuRNV0mETeWVGm8SkH0L7Jx4tIzpzD4kTvov-zyAo1e90fkiliz2duZfwABiQCFJ-F8ew9uxE7SJpQYz2Ym9aoNI6X7BZAuCims/s1600/M29DinerLaura.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="533" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu9_VuYE-xtWq9yfTr37yIKN0WmH97l2Vc7NAE3E65tuRNV0mETeWVGm8SkH0L7Jx4tIzpzD4kTvov-zyAo1e90fkiliz2duZfwABiQCFJ-F8ew9uxE7SJpQYz2Ym9aoNI6X7BZAuCims/s320/M29DinerLaura.jpg" width="177" /></a></div>
<strong>Laura is a friend, and waitress, at the M-29 Diner. Stooltime Counseling appreciates your support! Thank you, Laura.</strong>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-53672218163328421552007-02-26T11:24:00.001-05:002011-09-02T07:23:30.359-05:00WORDS ARE AS POWERFUL AS STICKS AND STONES<strong>TREATING SELF AND OTHERS WITH DIGNITY AND RESPECT</strong>
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<br />"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never harm me." Maybe not. The study of BEHAVIORAL KINESIOLOGY is showing how verbal abuse can do damage to the body like physical abuse. Verbal abuse may not leave any outward physical scars, but it could damage the body's defenses in other ways to weaken it, leading to other physical problems.
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<br /><em>Measuring the impact of verbal abuse on the body:</em>
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<br />Name calling is an angry behavior, and can be viewed as verbally abusive toward the intended target. Lets say we have two people standing face-to-face. One person acts as the aggressor, the other is the target of verbally abusive name calling. The job of the target is to listen to what the aggressor has to say while holding-out both arms so they are perpendicular to the floor on either side of the body. The job of the aggressor is to talk smack to the target, and to make it very personal. While the verbal rampage is happening, the aggressor reaches out with two fingers in an attempt to push-down one of the target's arms while the target resists. In most cases, the arm goes down almost immediately to illustrate the weakening of the target's physical strength during the verbal abuse. The same target is more likely to resist the pushing-down motion when there is no verbal abuse occurring.
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<br /><em>Three rules for relationships:</em>
<br /><strong>THE GOLDEN RULE
<br />THE PLATINUM RULE*
<br />OBEY THE FIRST TWO RULES</strong>
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<br />1) The Golden rule is, DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO UNTO YOU.
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<br />2) The Platinum rule is, DO UNTO OTHERS AS THEY WANT TO BE DONE UNTO.
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<br />3) Choose a color, gold or platinum, and observe how the relationship commands dignity and respect!
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<br />Based on the options above, who honestly enjoys being the target of verbal abuse? It is human nature to become defensive, as a way to protect ourselves, if we are a target. There are things we can do to protect ourselves if we become a target of verbal abuse.
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<br />One way is to work on improving our self-esteem so angry words can bounce off of us. It still hurts to hear someone talk smack to us, but the person with healthy self-esteem has learned what words to accept and reject as an actual depiction of their self-concept. Another way is to learn to be assertive with angry people who express like feelings in disrespectful ways.
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<br />One way we can use words to improve our self-esteem is to use positive self-talk whenever possible. This means learning to stop verbally abusing ourselves with an internal dialogue that is negative. Positive self-talk is one way to practice self-respect.
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<br /><strong>Example:</strong>
<br />Rather than say, "I'm stupid," after making an honest mistake, say, "I'm not happy with what I did. What can I do different the next time?"
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<br />A person working to improve their self-esteem is more likely to use positive self-talk. People with low self-esteem tend to accept the negative self-talk at face value rather than learn how to reframe it. When our self-esteem is on the road to becoming healthy, we treat ourselves with dignity and respect.
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<br />To be assertive with others who verbally abuse us means learning a communication skill called, "Verbal Judo." It involves deflecting and moving techniques as a way to sidestep the verbal abuse we hear when others feel the need to talk in a hostile manner.
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<br /><strong>For example:</strong>
<br /><em>Hostile Aggressor:</em> "You idiot! What's wrong with you?"
<br /><em>Assertive Target:</em> "I'm glad you can express your anger so freely (deflection), and I don't deserve being called an idiot (moving). Lets talk to each other in a civil manner, and maybe we'll get somewhere." (more moving)
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<br />[Verbally abusive people have low self-esteem and need to criticize others as one way to feel powerful or better than their target. Use positive self-talk and verbal judo to side-step the verbal assault. It's like learning how to say to an aggressor, "No matter what you say or do to me, I'm still a worthwhile person!"]
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<br />When we are assertive with others, everybody gets acknowledged and validated. If people did this all the time, I might not have a job as a counselor. People come to counseling to be acknowledged and validated because that need is not being met elsewhere. The need might be missing within a marriage, at work or how we treat ourselves. Additionally, when we incorporate either the golden or platinum rule as part of the foundation for a relationship, we are treating others with dignity and respect.
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<br />* "The Platinum Rule" is a registered trademark term by Dr. Tony Alessandra, a motivational speaker, who has granted permission for Stooltime Counseling to use it for this article. <a href="http://www.alessandra.com">http://www.alessandra.com </a>
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<br />Written by,
<br />Mark S. Rogers, LPC.
<br />Licensed Professional Counselor
<br />(6/06)
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<br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7YljtrKe8LNYfgxO26UaptdaEoQqWyBPG0c3sb4g8wd8M2-lxrI-rnWJ4Y4XYUMTN84RnOiVRpQT49dp1bPtgtdDoNhHo0zIhUqHkbv32mCkJqUUWGwTC344P3ShNXhFy8fZPI9vc660/s1600/Melissa.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7YljtrKe8LNYfgxO26UaptdaEoQqWyBPG0c3sb4g8wd8M2-lxrI-rnWJ4Y4XYUMTN84RnOiVRpQT49dp1bPtgtdDoNhHo0zIhUqHkbv32mCkJqUUWGwTC344P3ShNXhFy8fZPI9vc660/s320/Melissa.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5647736547763767202" /></a>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-46415003123088588642007-02-26T11:06:00.001-05:002015-05-16T23:09:15.417-05:00HYSTERIA<strong>Greek for "WANDERING UTERUS"</strong> <br />
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The word, HYSTERIA, is Greek in origin and means, "WANDERING UTERUS." Medical treatment for hysterical, ancient greek women included a genital massage to put the wandering uterus back into its place. The procedure was supposed to have a calming effect on the signs and symptoms of histrionic women. By today's standards, ancient Greek doctors would be called sexist, get sued for malpractice and most likely lose their medical license. [Talk about rubbing someone the wrong way]. Those were certainly different times than today, but a couple things about this strike me as interesting: <br />
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<strong>What kind of medical treatment did hysterical men receive for their histrionic behavior during that time of <em>human </em>evolution? Men do not have a uterus, but can act hysterically. </strong><br />
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<strong>Mass hysteria is a term commonly used to describe volumes of out-of-control people, who are probably in a panic due to hearing extremely negative information. For example, it is illegal to yell, "Fire," in a crowded theatre, despite our free speech, because to do so could lead to the trampling of people as everyone rushes to get out of the building at the same time.</strong><br />
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Is "hysteria" an unmanaged fear over an imagined problem or is it just a wastebasket diagnosis given by doctors who don't have the foggiest idea what else to call it when someone's irrational behavior is driven by emotional excesses? What are the signs and symptoms of someone who is acting hysterically? <br />
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<strong>Some signs include:</strong> <br />
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<em>Irrational or unreasonable behavior with an aggressive, dramatic, anxious and sometimes angry twist. Sometimes there is an insatiable need for attention for reasons of vanity. Behavior looks theatrical, over-the-top. The person can be obsessed with their appearance. Being flirtatious is common. Scarlet O'Hara is the poster woman for this type of personality disorder. </em><br />
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<em>Yelling and screaming while jumping up and down and getting in someone's face to make a point is a specific example. Sometimes behavior like this is rewarded as evidenced by the phrase, "The squeaky wheel gets the grease." Sometimes behavior like this can take its toll on the body as evidenced by losing ones voice or vision during all the commotion.</em><br />
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<strong>Some symptoms include:</strong> <br />
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<em>Extreme feelings of anxiety, agitation, restlessness and excitability or any subjective report that comes close to describing a "nervous breakdown." </em><br />
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<em><strong>Relationship Implications for the 21st Century:</strong></em><br />
<ol>
<li><strong><em>Histrionic behavior is one of five unreasonable types of personality disorders. The other four are borderline personality, anti-social, narcissistic, and obsessive-compulsive. </em></strong></li>
<li><strong><em>Approximately, 2% of the population shows signs and symptoms of poor impulse control and irrational thinking that are manifested in hysterical behavior.</em></strong></li>
<li><strong><em>Reasoning with unreasonable people is always a challenge because of the drama.</em></strong></li>
<li><strong><em>Counseling can encourage a person to learn the skills it takes to become more resilient to stress. Meditation or prayer, a moderate exercise program, yoga and a diet that includes protein and complex carbohydrates are also helpful to a person motivated to learn self-calming techniques.</em></strong></li>
<li><strong><em>Treat hysterical people with dignity and respect, but encourage them to get help.</em></strong></li>
</ol>
Written by,<br />
Mark S. Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor<br />
(1/06)<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCxKmQcIJdYM0Adh4WyINuROznQ5IxEyVpLW_2ryZWuGdzqKuQ1oAThFTcn6Dpdh7rw8iXTAyaaEJ1O7E8Jint6XsgQ_IjXc3JVXuLbo7Xbgdr-OXKGyR2s2M946ol-5FybQ_a69HCC54/s1600/Big+Boy.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5663432134248743138" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCxKmQcIJdYM0Adh4WyINuROznQ5IxEyVpLW_2ryZWuGdzqKuQ1oAThFTcn6Dpdh7rw8iXTAyaaEJ1O7E8Jint6XsgQ_IjXc3JVXuLbo7Xbgdr-OXKGyR2s2M946ol-5FybQ_a69HCC54/s320/Big+Boy.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 240px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 320px;" /></a>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-8803529496943707902007-02-26T10:51:00.016-05:002010-10-02T07:04:23.747-05:00CHOICES ARE COMMITMENTS<strong>FREEDOM OF CHOICE AND PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY</strong> <br /><br />Most people don't like being told what to think, how to feel or what to do because most people want to figure it out for themselves. It's a sign of independence and an exercise of free will. The choices we make help us decide how we want to live our lives, and are as personal as our thoughts, feelings and actions. We are making personal choices from the time we wake-up (What do I want to do today?) until we decide to go to bed (How much sleep do I want tonight?). Some choices are easy, others require deliberate thought or reflection. Sometimes, too, we decide to change our mind after having made a choice. The freedom to choose is a skill, and can be as simple as deciding between A, B or C, and as complex and meaningful as the commitment it represents. <br /><br />Think of that uneasy feeling we may get when our doctor confronts us about how we may be neglecting our health and fitness levels. The doctor says, "You need to do X, Y and Z or A, B and C will happen to you." We may become defensive, given the authoritarian tone of the doctor's message. After all, given our freedom to choose, each of us is in control of our own destiny, whether that means paying attention to our health and fitness or neglecting it. Doctors who practice good bedside manner know that they can attract more flies with honey than with vinegar. This means the doctor RECOMMENDS that we do X, Y and Z, based on clinical findings, thereby inviting us to become accountable for our own health and fitness. Instead of feeling defensive, we leave the doctor's office feeling emboldened with the courage to begin making some new choices on our own terms. The new choices we make represent a change-of-mind. <br /><br />After having made a choice, there is always the option to change our mind. All of us have the right to change our mind and make new choices when provided new information that impacts what we think, feel and do. Sometimes, however, changing our mind can come back to haunt us if it takes on the appearance of a lack of commitment. Choice without commitment is like a renege. Lets move from the health and fitness realm to the political arena to illustrate the point: <em>CHOICES ARE COMMITMENTS</em>. <br /><br />Taken from Letters To The Editor, Detroit Free Press, July 6th, 1990:<br /><br /><strong>BUSH SHOWS GUTS, BUT WHAT ABOUT INTEGRITY?</strong><br /><br /><em>"President George Bush has more guts than I thought. That's probably why I voted for him. As I read his lips a couple years ago, he had promised "no new taxes." Now he is thinking about changing his mind. He has the right to change his mind. He has the guts to take that risk.For a moment I want to forget about values such as integrity and credibility. Right now I'm busy thinking about changing my mind, too. For example, for whom do I want to vote during the next presidential election? For me, it's contingent on how far President Bush wants to stretch his thinking on the subject of new taxes. Even though I appreciate the man for his guts, I resent his thinking at the same time for wanting to break a campaign promise."</em><br /><br />[NOTE: Sometimes changing our mind works, sometimes it doesn't. Some people thought the presidential renege on a campaign promise (saying one thing, but doing another) contributed to daddy Bush being a one term president]. <br /><br />There are times when we make a choice and do not turn back. Jumping out of an air plane to sky dive is one example. There are other times we make a choice, but later change our mind. Either way, it's important to know that our choices are commitments. Ultimately, when we make a choice, or change our mind to represent a new choice, we are responsible for the thoughts, feelings and actions that underscore it. <br /><br />Know yourself, trust yourself and CHOOSE YOURSELF because it is probably the most important choice we can make. It's a reflection of our ability to make an informed decision, based on who we are and what we want to become.<br /><br />Written by,<br />Mark S. Rogers, LPC.<br />Licensed Professional Counselor <br />(8/05)<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNJSBqbsWC_OQy5ZovMPPSq8jDRwJzQNNmnflN_AfUPqwcO7Bk_cBn1kXAkVd3cuhmiX2j4SS5wkfJkfQYuNG5yeaGXs-yFBZJqJOxDDvuZukFQatrPdQcbmeko9kQMzgn0ZmFOPuuwhw/s1600/Kelly.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 150px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNJSBqbsWC_OQy5ZovMPPSq8jDRwJzQNNmnflN_AfUPqwcO7Bk_cBn1kXAkVd3cuhmiX2j4SS5wkfJkfQYuNG5yeaGXs-yFBZJqJOxDDvuZukFQatrPdQcbmeko9kQMzgn0ZmFOPuuwhw/s200/Kelly.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5523414081379854146" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin58nJFrNontAyEY0leyPCN4OADTiHXhSL1h1GoUAt30DHIf2Oc1fmNQkm4GvS3gQvB2Y11cUskNKMtJ14O-S2rDA-kxYfYjf-MRr6RlYmj8bpV6KjK3jKaZBN2W8_fwLJgExhlXbJzYU/s1600/Kelly01.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin58nJFrNontAyEY0leyPCN4OADTiHXhSL1h1GoUAt30DHIf2Oc1fmNQkm4GvS3gQvB2Y11cUskNKMtJ14O-S2rDA-kxYfYjf-MRr6RlYmj8bpV6KjK3jKaZBN2W8_fwLJgExhlXbJzYU/s200/Kelly01.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5523413791914075378" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Thanks for supporting Stooltime Counseling, Dr. Lu, <em>SUPERSTAR</em>!</strong>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-23919935724952208502007-02-26T09:48:00.003-05:002010-05-29T23:39:14.345-05:00EFFICIENCY AND EXPEDIENCY ON-THE-JOB<strong>HOW TO REGULATE THESE IMPORTANT CULTURAL VALUES LIKE A METAPHORICAL CHEETAH</strong> <br /><br /><em>Interpersonal/Psychological <br />Fitness/Fatigue <br />Technical/Tactical <br />Prayer</em><br /><br />It takes a number of skills to effectively function and compete in a world that promotes values like efficiency and expediency. Is there a correlation between being efficient and expedient and having the ability to survive and succeed? I suppose it depends on how we define "survival" and "success". Many people would agree that we are being asked to do more with less, and to do it as fast as we can. Most visibly it's happening in the work place, the environment that drives our economy and allows us to earn a paycheck so we can pay our bills, save money and buy the creature comforts that help make life enjoyable.<br /><br />When we begin to feel anxious at work, we are probably beginning to feel overwhelmed. This could be a result of many things. Do I feel comfortable with my skills? How would I judge my ability to multi-task? Could I use some help with time management? How do I fit-in to my work environment, given my interests, skills, abilities, etc? What do I need to do to manage my work environment and reaction to it? <br /><br /><strong>Here are some ideas:</strong> <br /><br /><em>Enlist the support of co-workers and the management team. Find people with whom you can talk, vent your feelings and exchange ideas. Move from feeling independent to interdependent. In other words, work as a team. </em><br /><br /><em>Reframe the negative thoughts and be positive! Rather than think, "I'll never get this job done," think, "Doing one thing at a time will eventually get the job done. I am persistent!" </em><br /><br /><em>It helps to live in the moment at work, focusing on the task at hand rather than the desired result. Professional athletes use this technique during game time. For example, football players concentrate on one play at a time rather than winning the game. Winning the game is the goal, yet there are action steps or objectives that are met prior to winning. Focus on the task at hand, and be positive to increase chances of winning!</em><br /><br /><em>Find ways to manage stress. This could mean going to the gym to work-out/blow-off some steam after a challenging day at work. What about taking up a hobby as a way to find a distraction from the work day? Be creative, and keep it healthy. Alcohol use probably won't work because its use could create a separate problem later.</em> <br /><br /><em>Always work on self-improvement. This could mean taking new classes to learn new skills. Stay competitive at work by updating already used on-the-job skills. </em><br /><br /><em>Keep a positive outlook. Find a "positive" with every "negative" that gets thrown your way. Even the loss of one's job could be a "positive" if it means finding something better to replace it. Don't be that person who goes to the proctologist and opthamologist for a consult. That person probably has a crappy outlook on life!</em> <br /><br /><em>Be aware of your breathing to remain centered and grounded. Use deep breathing techniques when your breaths feel short and shallow to slow down a fast pulse and racing thoughts. If you work at a desk and can do this, get up and walk around every so often for a few minutes to stretch your muscles.</em><br /><br /><em>If we are fortunate, a membership to the 3-F club is helpful: Faith, Family and Friends. This trio packs a wallup in the support department! The three can be very helpful in defusing distress when the support is mutual. </em><br /><br /><em><strong>I'm open to hearing other ideas. What has helped you to successfully compete on-the-job? Please write a comment to me to list your ideas so others can learn from your experience. Thank you!</strong></em><br /><br /><strong>SUPERCHARGE ME!</strong><br /><br />Written by,<br />Mark S. Rogers, LPC.<br />Licensed Professional Counselor<br />(8/05)<em></em><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI3CV3-RlRUjjLM5eyJ0p31Me8pXAjAuhDtBmTtGnb35fvhiBe7wu0fZKEkv4D3HYvZQM31yQBu92tGFSXUaa5tvDDsdJMV5RMoscgZNCUwtn8dsi-vRUJaz0BHebUtgmye8G-4B19WoM/s1600/ryanm.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI3CV3-RlRUjjLM5eyJ0p31Me8pXAjAuhDtBmTtGnb35fvhiBe7wu0fZKEkv4D3HYvZQM31yQBu92tGFSXUaa5tvDDsdJMV5RMoscgZNCUwtn8dsi-vRUJaz0BHebUtgmye8G-4B19WoM/s400/ryanm.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5476231469833779762" /></a> <strong>Thank you for supporting Stooltime Counseling, Ryan!</strong>Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3261476698394355060.post-911810488864171202007-02-25T02:59:00.027-05:002018-11-19T00:22:44.798-05:00STOOLTIME COUNSELING OPERATION: WORKOUT<strong>Earn A Workout At The BrickHouse Gym With The Stoolman AND An STC Ball Cap</strong><br />
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Stooltime Counseling celebrates its anniversary every July 4th since 2001. Let me take a minute to thank everyone who has acknowledged my work in one way or another since 2001. As a token of my appreciation, I am offering a special promotion. This article explains the promotion, which is interactive in nature, and takes a different direction from others I have written. It is your chance to earn one free gym workout with me, and receive a free Stooltime Counseling ball cap for showing up at the gym.<br />
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I plan to stay busy, putting pen to paper, writing articles for this website. The invitation goes out to my readers to write to me about your "fitness" story. Your effort could empower you to be my guest at a local gym, and acquire a free STC baseball hat on the day we workout together.<br />
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One person each month will earn the opportunity to be my guest at the BrickHouse gym in Mt. Clemens, Michigan. At the gym, we will talk about your fitness goals and tailor a workout to meet your individual fitness needs. You will also receive a free Stooltime Counseling ball cap ($20.00 value) that can be used as part of your workout attire. After we're done, there will be an opportunity to talk about the workout experience as one way to verbally reinforce your efforts.<br />
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<strong>Here is what I am asking you to do:</strong><br />
<em>In 200 words or less, essay format, tell me what important lessons in life have taught you or a loved one to either begin or want to begin a doctor recommended regular exercise plan. How were you (or they) encouraged, inspired, motivated or supported?</em><br />
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This written exercise requires the author to wear a thinking cap, and to include some passion and feeling into what is being written.<br />
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I ask that you contact me by way of e-mail or snail mail.<br />
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All age groups are invited to participate, but if you are a minor, and your essay is one of the twelve I choose each year, I ask that your parent or guardian accompany you to the gym.<br />
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I request that each of the twelve chosen essay writers every year have medical clearance to participate in resistance (strength/weight training) and endurance (aerobic) work.<br />
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The BrickHouse gym is located in Mt. Clemens, Michigan, and it is up to you to get there on your own or with help from your parent or guardian.<br />
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The BrickHouse Gym has qualified and capable fitness staff, who are available during workout hours. Currently, I am not a certified fitness instructor, but I am a certified sports counselor, who is passionate about working-out!<br />
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All essays become the property of Stooltime Counseling unless you ask that yours be returned. If you have any questions or comments about this promotion, please contact me for clarification.<br />
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I will accept essays on an ongoing basis for an indefinite period of time.<br />
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<strong>Thank you and GOOD LUCK!</strong><br />
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Written by,<br />
Mark S. Rogers, LPC.<br />
Licensed Professional Counselor and<br />
Certified Sports Counselor, Diplomate<br />
(6/05)<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTN6g2N1ai-bOeOwWjTWUisxHKrtSntawkjHOAIBuTJwNdgARwfRTtmqW9D4XM6tfVm4oNNsC09yeZGah3fJxJuBQRJvFWdhA9jcY53jLcloa8SXajF4jSGzA4Z_DqkF6jddAONpkMIz0/s1600/100_1812.jpg"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5478381631869745234" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTN6g2N1ai-bOeOwWjTWUisxHKrtSntawkjHOAIBuTJwNdgARwfRTtmqW9D4XM6tfVm4oNNsC09yeZGah3fJxJuBQRJvFWdhA9jcY53jLcloa8SXajF4jSGzA4Z_DqkF6jddAONpkMIz0/s400/100_1812.jpg" style="cursor: hand; display: block; height: 300px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a> <strong>Thanks for showing Stooltime Counseling readers you support this website, Marissa and Ken! I appreciate it.</strong><br />
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<span style="color: red;"><strong>Please Note:</strong></span><br />
<span style="color: red;">Sadly, in June, 2011, the BrickHouse gym closed its doors. Gym memberships were subsequently transferred to Metro Family Fitness gym located in Clinton Township, MI. Gladly, beginning June, 2011, the above referenced offer applies to working-out there as opposed to the BrickHouse gym. </span><span style="color: #993300;">Here's a link to their website:</span> <a href="http://www.macombathleticclub.com/">Macomb Athletic Club.</a><br />
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Circa November, 2014, Metro Family Fitness changed its name to Macomb Athletic Club. You can use the same link above to read details about what the gym has to offer their members.<br />
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Beginning in 2018, Macomb Athletic Club changed ownership. Long-standing gym memberships were no longer acknowledged. I found a new fitness location. Beginning in June, 2018, <a href="https://www.planetfitness.com/">Planet Fitness</a> became my gym-of-choice!Mark S. Rogers, LPC.http://www.blogger.com/profile/13197520143580959860noreply@blogger.com0